But that's just fuel.....

 And all the " ohh you are an internet  conspiracist too..." as narcissistic an assumption seemingly default

Nope just learned how to think for myself....

When even the slow'hand of god....' starts to make vids about something even an actually intelligent 'god' cannot know about, whether some or other bug or injection has 'harmed' him.... the mindbody interrelation of all even humble hobbits being very complex..... 

way way beyond 'Deepmind' as even the magnificent Prof MArtin hasn't been able to update his splendid 1997 suggesting its very weird....

rather than saying GET OUT IN THE SUN... walk exercise and ... be NEW do things you dont want to do..m aybe even for others you really know not to even slightly like..... as that makes the mind stop mulling on its own miserable inflammations or whatever else nobody will ever really know is extant... but make some new bits that work too...or even better

in other words (said as shyly lifelong conflict avoidant expert,  hobbit) fight...a bit

gets you to live on 

and without a tad of brianrot either... as it requires brain and guile to avoid the backseeking knives all around...

(actual data does confirm ask any honest old folks home superintendent to ask the ones who live...longer....just "why"? .i know i did around 2012..) 

 

Right the real [InNix!]version needs to start and begineth with .,... define it, first

 So three year'nago

(funny thing is the current one - talk about hardship! i shall miss it one can get used to ANYthing....

 even this really THICK unintelligible 'app' that sometimes stands photos on their side just to remind you how like them it is... then its made by them so whatdyer expect..)

There i am innocently natterin' about small spaces even if the opening lines were crystal clear....

I mean you can't be clearer than  " all the women over here in the actual environment which has 10% pop density of your, well you will say it one day! yerself.... HATEfilled .... suburb....ran away to be closer to Harvey's Nicker collection .......

or died of Bovarian cancer [ copyright me, just came along into my polluted stream

of consciousness meanderin one of errs the other day

likely up by the waste of good stone in some so called circle

I think thats what that EVERYwhere common-as-muck book is about, 

lust for pretty things.... 

eats yer up from within...

but there's REAL books by real peeps like whom i am 

soon as i read it only a few years ago i knew what books is for...

to find yourself: total  irrelevant slightly thoughtful bloke gets new neighbour sees her on the landin' takes a fancy, in propper French manner, knows she will like boys or if having a phase still like boys just as much and respect them as necessarily evil, and part of real life....

anyway nice cups of espresso ensue...

but shock horror innocent naive bloke encounters some evidence that in actual fact she's a tea leaf....nickin her own family's gold or purse...

" ohh god will i ever ever meet ANYone on the level...  i knew she was ok but it seems not and no way do i want to be around any dodgy loon  ex towny or towny as there are simple lines in life and thankfully i dont have some weird need half of em seem to do to tango over them lines... just for kicks or why?..."

Turns out spoiler alert  everybody naturally was rather miffed at her the maybe nicker...  and he went through such a wonderfully philosophic time pondering his 'love' vs authenticity...

he needn't have as all along she was innocent entirely...

some back of the sofa nicked it instead or whatever second i met him thats me....

Anyway i'm not interested in fine old stories only those of now...

But then i should have gave her my speech that ive been giving nicely for a decade... but even Balzac that genius of true art, that takes you there and yes does have a tad of judginess to it  when he takes you right into his mind in a  standard human way 

as humans are standard even New New New Labour seem to be realising that at last even if it won't work as there's a whole massive INDUSTRY (see third sector audio waffle)  based on the labels the newwords that are as meaningless....all of it

(capital i didnt know:  Totty twinned with Narnia [sic]   well i did, but didnt know how the whole region of course attracts the acolytes sub species hamngers on...like flies attracted to a turd..scrappin over that particularly sweet LOOKing dribble off the crumbplate...nothing to do with me but its always eventually good to know who one is or what the real so called 'people' is)

Anyway there we are three years ago

" i'm bulletproof..."

well OBViously nobody is entirely but you can't tell em ....any of them..... even her, an actual proveable truth, i bet still:

" as i was a propper parent genuinely respecting the innate frequency and naturane faeryness and pixiness ness and mystical shmaniac Shakti within, of my kid 100%, i would give her POWER  - the real version, unlike thefake faerying about at these new woodland schools as their parents are too busy buying competitive yoga mats,  to get their kids to read books... so yes kiddo even at the pub for early dinner... and get her to read out the last few pages of WAtership down in public knowing exactly what always would be occurin' " hahh hahh LOOK at my mad bad baldy of a dad blubbing...you can see the tears welling up LOOK!.... blubbing ....at a silly story about bunnies and Fu Inle faking interest in one just about to expire from the mixi...... god how pathetic!"

"But other than some minor occasional ' ohh yet another one..'...and appropriate feelings sometimes.., yes i am bulletproof this is something you EARN if you fight a bit of a fight and no English woman ever ever ever even wants to have a second cuppa with anyone who has been a bit of an actual 'warrior' as you pretend you are too... thats not important but...  ohh please not you too......"

unfortunately i didnt give the standard speech of ten years starting around 2010...would it have made any dif?

"luv....  right i am a scribe+ i sit for days sometimes with those going to courts about domestic issues such as wars over kids etc... these are in the civil courts which work on paper representation... i would write down for them their STORIES which is what lore is based on...  as they couldnt even think about who they were any more so i spent a few days with each teasing out who they were... for their story... so they can protect their OWN kids possibly under threat of removal... for a huge commission in someones back pocket one day down the road....  from some private orphanage or the like.... 

" luv [at first only the f.s the men caught up about 5ish years later]  since around 2008ish EVERY single litigant going to court DEMANDS that their story is mainly or in fact ONLY about how HE has serious 'control' issues...  every single one.... poor judges they must get so bored of every single statement saying exactly the same....  and then the blokes caught up and now both sides endlessly going to great lengths about the 'control' issues of the other side...  and then from around i dunno as i started serious online use of online about injustice via the 2006 test case but saw it perverted so i gave up... around maybe 2015ish every single person started to accuse every other person of 'narcissism'...  like everyone...

" now never mind a great strategy,  if we didnt use the n word at all and told the judgie about when you have managed to compromise and how fabulous your kid IS despite you.... maybe judgie may find it ...different...interesting... indeed even LIKE you which is wot lore is about dont be fooled by the word 'justice'...

" ehh if EVERY single person in YUK is accusing every other single person of being a 'narcissist' well doesnt it all kindof cancel itself out.... ? ..like lets find something to talk about we can DO something about...maybe..??"

nope silly me i should have at least tried

But then i didn't know that in fact my slightly exaggerated speechifying lines above - only to help peeps actually WIN court battles they said they wanted to win often with tears in their eyes..(was maybe at least 75%  - 'control' then 'narc' ).. from early 2010s...

was actually 100% correct in that it seems every single person in this whole Penninsula does indeed think almost everyone else they may speak with not merely shallow bs speak.. they are a "narcissist"

It makes me smile inside as i attempt a mental whispered game of " hmm...how long will she last out before using it..?"

so i understand how even a good to fine mind was polluted indeed drowned in the shit in her own shitcreek - figuratively speaking

And as per last or last but one audio no immo ever ever had power til second gen to say anything real  - critique fully their adopted sociuety, as Mister Naipaul explained most beautifully in Bendy River 

which is sad because the first line " and before you say anything about us UK should be before us in the queue at The Hague.."  about 3/4 of the world does also know is true  

And how the F35s over GAza still were kept tickin over with UK 'logistical' support...euphemism for some bloke in a houseboat probably offshore even ... brokering the arms most to scaredy cat, slithery.... to actually direct market them ... the Middle Men of the Mil Ind Comp thats UK...

but i bet it has never been repeated to anyone else.

Anyway such a hard word....  especially if one has just become surreally absurdist commentatin' on billions of vids with nowt ever to say so not 'join em' just....

i don't know but all that matters

is even a badger baiter can become an 'honoured' Member of the Badger Exterminatrixes, too  

but once ok art ....which shows how Mister 'God', 

the hand of god

In fact pretty much only his hand

No fancy settin' fire to his axe with lighter fluid no fancy anythin just stood upright unsmiling likely in junky withdrawals...

didnt really TRY!

and no cameraman even tried to film his face - nothing to see just an axeman doing his job....... 

and thus is perhaps a good record of how That Sublime kindof gets invented 

no not by MBE him.... 

turncoat .. toady...

but the first time maybe ever someone just ..  without trying just let them ferkin angels be in the orchestra alongside hidden behind the 'gear' too.........and just.... 

well there are no words for trusting in the 'moment' to deliver some...thing... perfect

THE one and only horny mum of them Welsh Hills...

 Now.... what the English fail to ever have recorded as maybe they don't know about it (me only interested in the actual counter-culture, internationalist version and TOMORROW) was how from the 80s meandering many thousand kms of European hills byways out of the way places... almost only; almost continually for twenty years.. from the hillpaths of S Island NZ early 80s to all the European ranges (never ever with walking poles or crampons as the only place you need them - top 'o those Alps or Pyrenees is for showoffs   with less sense and more cash than those of us who are quite content with a few thousand metres and no showoffs with neon or the lastest expensive haversack around (i saw that the  antique version is so so so the bird magnet around Gweek Helston most of their polluted S coast - clearly the way to entice a girlfriend..if you are a girl.. errata middle aged woman pretending you still are one with an antique rucksac as old as you all shiny and refurbed just for a walk to the shops )

 is how if one were tramping around the 'bothies' - yet another word monetised to trap tourists in absurdly overpriced 'shepherds huts' - i am a allowed to parody lampoon say what a load of wank as i was an actual real  Full Monty in fact quiote often solo hillwalkin lookin for the lost sheep one...shepherd, in the days no self respecting shepherd would require shelter from anything ...  

in that one went Bathsheba herding on wet or cold days a more indoor sport that wasnt a sport as you needed someone to help salvage the burning hay with you ...Johnny come lately from Troy pissed as a fart ....... and fine days went to work....

Anyway meandering further afield for good one hoped then, walkers huts, youth hostels.... all over Europe..cafes in the morning in the outdoors the olnly civilised way to chat up girls ... with philosophy
And over the years one would fall in at times with other likelminded humble walker/cheapbackpack-er types... many who may have a copy of Siddhartha tucked into their bag ..i was too prejudiced to read not against Germans but knowing already the 'East' is full of bonkers most materialistic types who  would sell you a  dogburger made from your own pet one if they could turn a 'Buddhist' buck just so ... these days they sell the backpackers some kind of supposed alcohol that...kills them...as they knew it would as sure as ferrits are...

Anyway none of my interest as its not for others of any other county to comment on the indigenous county unless they are George Borrow updated just meandering and chronicling all counties, as one meandered all around Europe especially.... 

What one does NOT encounter is always far more interesting: even then....  Europeans kiwis... even the occasional Yank one would sort of fall in with for a few days completely sex-neutral good company maybe walking together... almost every one would NOT wish to be at the same table in the Youth Hostel as...the English...

So interesting....  some kind of second sight some kind of intuition or maybe just an allergy to arrogance especially in such places .... the places one was in so as to be nobody...

I wonder if there ever was any truthful travel writing about just this...Graves? probably not... whasisface getting his disproportionate Chatwinesque attention...?

noting how many on these European Tours or just meandering did kind of avoid the English...

None of my business as i began to mainly mate with the actual human ones...

But theres one thing for certain in life a life of meadering ...and living many years at 1400' in the Black Mountains  2/3 of the 00s... hill people are far far far more chilled and 'above' the nonsense this Frog is being lauded for ... by the 'tech bros' (and now the BBC yestermorn predawn)  - no nobody EVER coveted ANYthing  - never ..i never even sensed any person wanting what others had.... needing to be in that herd...

which is either a hill-person inner setting or maybe just a standard GENUINELY 'rural' person inner setting.... i have never wanted ANYthing anyone else has or is... well maybe one... a certain 'skirt' ...

but other than birds 'n Bees... nowt ever

But i met one mountain dwelling mum who clearly WANTED something.....

The only one ever. 

Funny that so if i wrote about or even to, her daughter.. famous BAFTA babe, for nothing i bet...

"Gina never mind the nights we spent under the cold moon up outdoors on The Pass.... i think you made the first pass, i wonder if you recall with crystalnacht clarity when you took me home to mums for dinner that time, .... and i loved to bits her warm girlfriend, Jen, too...  but didnt really have the attention span to take her in too as your utterly Grande Belazza mum  spent half the evening smiling at me in a  way  - with her Elizabeth Taylor kindof look on a good day all supermodel sexy full woman way...that only said ONE thing...

never mind not caring for her daughter's  rights to her boyfriend.... that just maybe her girl-on-girl thing she they made SUCH a thing - i guess the first in valley and surrounding hills........was just a phase...

your own existence being rather proof of that too...."

Nope its a strange sad thing being shipped off to an English  boarding school does to you (i still have the letters so many) ...

Go and become business partner creative partner of a British 'national Treasure'...

who has done more to ruin this society than anyone else ..

if a man.. i mean a man-man like Primo who never really even moaned about Auschwitz that near killed him but looked inside at us ALL through the lens of it...

..  had slightly fallen from 'grace' publicly in a way that one cannot remember why it was so made up...

and then spends a decade making public and then internetty pity pieces about all his  so many issues and illnesses and mental wonkinesses 

 he would have been told to fuck off and get another agent if he can find one that is....

but no.....  the one good thing about Mister Fry is he discovered (i forget why)

that freedom of speech is rather crucial

otherwise.... talk about having owning neurotically NEEDing..... so so much public space, oxygen....with nothing whasoever to say ever...

beyond which good old Oscar once did in actually BEAUTIFUL words, getting his fair proportion of one of many 1.5% minorities ... for a whole lifetime of Frys..

Never mind how many other genuinely opressed minorities exist that never get a word ...  like the solo environmentalist wandering the lanes of Titley or Herrock hill where 2020 thousands of acres were felled IN BIRD BREEDING SEASON 100% against the lore...but nobody dared say... so i couldnt

even parody the signage put up around by their woman PR with her details giving the snidest reasoning ever for breaking the law....

(the only reason your environment is fucked is NO Green or even likely future BAfta nominated Fergal Sharkey  ever does the extremely hard DULL work over many years to make sure quite adequate EXISTING law is actually  even policed! never mind kept to)

Of course Gina won't make that film.... as she ran away from hers ok fair dinkum a tad mined .... and fabulous MOST modernist romantic lanscape under the full moon that night....

you either STAY a person of the hills or...

funny thing is thought it could never be wrenched out of you...

Perhaps one man alone could, whats their word ohh yes transition, someone...

But dont think io am negative as in the audio yesteraft the FULL version of the only one.... who actually ever did transition ALL the way....from corporate MAnchester PR queen...

to actual shepherd...

to wandering down to COOP, ion her truck,  in the middle of nowhere,  if she saw me on my old bike heading that way 

as she knew only one man appreciated her genuine 100% curative healing transition:

" Helen you make me bonkers the way you are wearing as usual your eau de lanolin to go shoppin'.... but more than that its the way you really are proud of it.... always.your face always says just that.....and it is the REAL you....not just a phase..." 

ahhh 6%...

 Now, in a peninsula of  100% gibbers, not only does one have to define that word, even if utterly pointless, as all my dull life (well from age15ish when the first wave of bluehairs invaded Theatre Clywyd - was that Mold? even then that place on the fringe of the hiils of N Wales full of nasty junky drugs and bovvaboys so we  my sweet wholesome underclass pals of youth never ventured there incase ...

So this class of Nutzis who started to roll out the 'culture' of that very very deprived poor scruffclass region back 'to' its indigenous peeps -  my neighbours (i say my as my parents hardly had anything to do with them unless transactionally.. )  

We literally would laugh about some or other faery tale myth of the 'natural' folk of region even wanting their dinosaur language, 'back' .. the bluehairs (we didnt know then) based their future government pension pots upon all those pots of indigenous gold buried by sweet nice peasants hiding away from some nasty invader who stole their language and   .. (the 'public' side -  one means the newly arrived lanyard class who colonised a closed old theatre nobody liked or used.... that is...) 

when your home territory was unpronouceable LLangynhafal ...unless you were a kid of said parish and said it when directing the Lowlander girls up to your lonely hills... and even the born 'n breds hardly ever used the placename, as they were just fine speaking in the English language their tractor handbooks came in, and sheepdip bottles ...and anyway everyone knew where the farms were by surname, either English Whittingham or Parry or Jones - all the varying variants of them.......well you have all this in perspective.

I never heard the word "Welsh" ever..never...., especially when twice a year the farms around would by ESP as hardly anyone talked to each other the rest of the time too busy surviving, 'gather' to combine their labour and feet to walk ....all several hundred sq km.... a couple of times a year to gather the sheeps...

deliberate dumbed down wording there only cos of boredom

we all were then but....

now.... by happenstance as i doubt he even looked at the ts and cs although we had a house with  20 acres about a km from the 'common' we never used that word, only the mountains, a few of the 40acreish  farms  right on the edge - meaning fields actually the first fields down from the wall that was the 'mountains'  had fallen pretty much into Wasteland and dereliction and property man my father picked them up for very little and my real cross, eyeing them up to be the first one in the UK to REALLY publicise the yuppie barn - one of his things (via RIBA magazine) 

which the local farmers he ignored often would gibe wont end well, in fact we were all wrong, as i was shyly on their side " this wont go anywhere ..."

But thats all nothing to do with me, 

all i know is what was REAL community..

couple of times a year a ragtag band of sadly only male blokes would sort of by esp sort of park their very old clunky landrovers - the few who could afford them that is, and on foot we would walk the whole of that few hundred sq km....

nobody would risk their essential landrover up the really buggered up mountain tracks as they needed to keep the thing problem free on the road back and forth to get their groceries or take their kids to school and none had a dime to spare ever everyone accepted entirely...

no quads not invented then not even motorbikes as none of the farmers could afford one of them ... and certainly ditto regrading nags... 

I hadnt learned to do the dogs...

because in fact the dogs   were inadequate in that very upsy downsy hillside topography  a dozen sheeps could be blissfully munching away all day with the 'muster'  ongoing all around them, and even the dumb dogs couldnt be trained to scout the WHOLE area including all the small hidden away hollows surrounded by steep banks or undulations nearby upland stream,  never mind all that towering bracken.. and get them ALL in. (for lowland newgrass 'feasting' or their annual bath or nailbar time) ...so you had to cover every single sq km by....foot...

no walking sticks no map no nothing ... no useless dogs... and certainly no ugly neon....

just like a mountain goat...

and one slip in such hollows and dips you may have to wait days before the extremely small band of us may stumble across some disabled  actual mountain shepherd 

(yes i was one...  a real one for 5ish years which wne you are a teenager is a very very long time...... and there were only about 10 of us who had 'grazing rights'   to that whole wilderness likely the same size in reality - actual 'common' as the underwhelming tourist trap of the SW, and we were so thinly spread over that couple of hundred sq km one rarely even knew who was doing the same forever role  a few km along that wall....)

anyway ehhh....community: it was brilliant. Most of the year grunt oif you are lucky from your adjoining farmer.... but a couple of days a year without having to be told to or with any complaint about the last 6 mths of weirdo grunts... there would be perfect harmony. Even the odd smile... the maybe 4 or 5 of us at that communal all hands on deck gathering...

And the one word nobody ever ever used was 'Welsh' ... some families obviously English sounding such as Wittinam'  perhaps only there 30 or so years maybe had moved in from Shropshire...others, them Parry or Joneses... probably many generation peasant farmers...

But nobody ever used any word to delineate what the obvious accent was...

nor ever really mentioned the completely natural apartheid (as the 'Welsh' girls were kindof prettier in a certain fizzy way and wore more oppressively conformist in the way that say Mandy fabulous  sex kitten to the school bullies would personalise her green school dress in a wonderfly slutty as possible way but none of the welsh were allowed to by their mum or chapel [none ever went to!]  and thus there was a certain 'something' in their attire the in-your-face Mandies could never replicate in a million years of trying tp be as modern as possible....and it wasnt fair as the 'native' tongue welsh about a thrird of the comprehensive dump school had their own section for most of their lessons in the  Welsh language not one ever even mentioned all it meant was one had to wait until breaks to have the true thrill [ no american pornographer could ever understand how less is more and more clothing if its Rhian in her very very Nutzi sharplyironed  to perfecting, nonsexual pencil thin skirt her mum will have thought will keep her chaste .... was the only one you REALLY wanted to chase around the yard to where the bikes were left...but it wasnt fair one had to be in the apartheid stream meaning one saw far less of the quite equally 'free love' other lot..... ) 

Until of course it will have changed now 

And by 2008 well my ohh my.... my very toughnut champion ferret breedin, hillwalking  lass, 10cm taller than anyone else in her class,  came home sometimes in a quite delicate mood over a  period and eventually dad alone got her to open up...

(with some trepidation....thinking someone was gangbangin'  her in the bogs at breaktime she was genuinely hurting in her soul as i could feel)

" well..... it sounds silly .... but it hurts me.... S**** .. [ the senior Social Workers daughter very popular girl bigging herself up always kindof understood to be school headgirl-in-waiting ]  she keeps saying to me  all the time ....'Esti we feel SO SO sorry for you.... really sorry ... that you arent ...Welsh'... god it kindof hurts me inside...." 

so said that popular main-girl with SW mum who really made it clear she was Mother Theresa too....... the schoolgirl then near ten

 they all kindof touched their metaphorical hem, 

to... in USA she would be the cheerleader one at the front, of that pervy-porn-parade

i never had the heart to say of course " yea...deliberately.... you were made 3 km inside safety - the county of England, cos they went nuts decades ago...a different 'lore'  a completely made up version of Dylan Thomas who couldnt wait to leave the mad dump stuck in the century before last....  in fact he became a thinker/poet only in London... prostituting a fantasy version of his county [not a typo  - deliberate, when you roam their hills for your existence as teen....there are no borders]  of birth... as he wasnt good enough to be really original and say anything real about anything real... such as how oppressive Rhian's stupid mum was in choice of skirts.... except it failed as you cannot dress 'down' her so wonderfully bright eyes and a sexy smile i would die for to see one more time....  that were ten times sexier than Mandy's rebelliously painted toenails or even Melanie's similarly shaped skirt (but a much darker shade of rebelious green!) with an ironic  English freelove girly twist in that you just knew it was saying the exact opposite of Rhian's ....or that was the intention...   that failed.

And nobody EVER i knew had ever even heard of...King Arthur... the Managobbyion or whatever it was called...

As in fact our splendid just slightly hippyish history teachers knew even then mid to late 70s...

he never existed except in the minds of.....

I mean you do have to blame their high priest the forerunner to deathcults that still exist like Crowleigh

 ....

says it all biorn in junky central likely even then they would be experimenting in coffee shops with 7 spoonfulls of sugar instead of  how coffee was invented to be drunk strong black and no sugar...

always of course these English junkies  - if not in person doubtless giving the nod  to some Opium Eater down the road... get some things right...

Even the girls from down the valley where the dead language of the DEAD word (that half of the artists in PAstyshire think is so so alive !!!  as a branding.... wait til you see MY art collage of their bullshit)

hiraeth is DEAD  it means " some fake Londoner,  junky who is desperate to make up some book that hasnt been done before  about a word NOBODY ever used cos its dead.... in more ways than one... makes a coffee table book about a dead word which actually means:

 ' we lost our old life ... cos we became so alcoholic and tv addicted by the 90s  most of us are too fat or busy wifebeating to ever go for a walk on our lovely hiraethy  hills..... and we will never  get it back [actual defn of hiraeth lost forever]  cos we became too alcy chipfat addled and Pobol y Cwm tv addicted to bother trying ....   whereas saudade the Portuguese  version is not [ no its not as your Guardian tells tou one of those untranslatable words]  about a wholesome past lost  forever one must just moan about it actually means [ see Pereira MAintains clue is he resists in Rua Saudade... no spastic Britolite critic will tell you about this! ] ... nope we can stilljust maybe FIGHT to get back the wholsome better times...

 so yes as usual they have some good things they PR ...

and maybe the 'free love' that knew no boarders, nor Rhian's oppressive hem...  in my yoof.... 

was ever present most happily....

 a few even made it clear they did love the Parfum...

of freshly mown hay and even lanolin

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

ahh yes 6% battery only... 

so ehh...

when you have a whole region - penisnsula ..of gibbers

what you have to do years ago is plan every smallest 5km drive to maximise charging (no cash to run motor..)...and words jotted and...

'issues' 

not that anyone actually ever cares about 'issues' they may themselves Fakebook promote.... caring is good for you, especially if it hurts...

cos eventually the hurt phase turns out to be exactly that....

 

... hmm did i finish that point all these Blakes and that whole gang of private schoolboys.. DeClancy  even whatisname Bishe ..never mind   Lord Mad BAd.... 

all of them perhaps starting with Blake created this whole mythology .... its easy to make up 'myth'..or exagerate it for attention...

merely because they werent actually good writers like for instance Silas' mum, Ms Evans

and frankly theyre just trying to out-bad the badboy next door.... so dull, shame they succeeded...

just as the English bluehairs invading Theatr Clywyd way back then (further away from their bnosses and nobody else wanted those jobs so they had 'autonomy' to go mad and invent something never existed)  succeeded in creating a myth about the 'welsh' needing more welshness as theyre opressed...

only by the dinosaurs like Rhian's mum as even she had Reggie Perrin or Man Alive or the great 70s tv...

they chose to be what they are...

and no dead language even has words like 'free love'...

or even 'fax machine'

and Nobody oppressed Eleri....   with her 'English' surname 

and Eisteddfod fame

to be cont

 

Now ..

 ...i know ..fancy words like "the sublime" ...all a bit hard to get the (well she said it " the education a disaster" and in fact it's more a case of just the general dumbing down, as i didn't have any education... but in time educated onesself bit by bit and for NO 'reason'... that's the thing no reason... and i still remember sat in my old motor 35 years ago as even The ...(what does one call a national broadcaster that posits almost its whole output on a corruption of the actual data?..mustthink of a simple name, in Time..was going to be the GAy Times but we read that age 17 and it was a fine mag..i still have a photo of Mark with his copy reading everything no prejudice just reading all opinion)    before it was that, reported fact by some thinkers before John Gray was allowed on to be part of the dumbing down, hearing   " and everything is dumbing down" )  modern day Fakebookese infected angry little 

spittle

which isnt a "divide"

It's merely a form (notebook a week back it made ME smile ) of Bovarian cancer, actually not a 'form', it just is

And all your protein folding alogorithms in the world wont figure why it is...

unless you read Silas.... then Turgenev, Bates, Wharton...  ehh and well Alexei kindof got there  - the sane Alexei that is who didnt make a whole sexist series attacking a woman snakeoiler...

 without pointing the finger at her more senior (snakeyoil as he back massaged)  man friend 

to be cont and entirely opened up....soon

The Sublime

 the last little section of reflection has had a bit of pictorial add in....

 hahh hahhhh.... now we're in trouble.....meaning the whole of civilisation which started with the first real book .. probably before in fireside stories

Anyway... Youtube seems to have a new neurosis in that you put up a few minutes of video as in that last one and it now spends 5 minutes checking 'content' which means of course their fancy new 'AI' will 'read' it....

Now i know there is NO hope when the only woman i  knew had a good mind goes and as usual FAkefriend-performs interest in 'AI' as if it is some cute little tool that even underttands basic intelligentish wellish read and do a bit of ones own sleuthing too as i BELIEVE in 'some'thing....in other words it can 'chat' ordinary post-enlightenment thoughtful   person speak...

 

only once " ok chat with me cunt...what is The Sublime" in fact i asked it that obvious question in as simple language as possible. No ambiguity...

The Sublime is something one so rarely sees. I saw it in someones artwork yesterday....   it 'elevates' you for REAL....no faux pretence of liking something as all the other vipers all cliquey like it too....

Nope... the chest heaves with emotion  - the right kind - 'awe' but not the awful English Public School boy version of 'awe' being something that's gonna whack you on the bottie if you are Mister great actor McDowell in IF... one cowers at - pretending stiff upper lip to take it like a man but you know that that kind of 'awe' will hurt you at some pointy if it can....

(as in the great storms Turner painted up in his log cabin)

Nope.... The Sublime is in fact (my hated word) kindof about juicy magic...maybe magic... it never quite reveals itself or purpose... but European languages and dictionaries are far more enlightened in suggesting it may be there, and  of 'lofty' intent.... maybe for goodness? one never really knows but that's the hope....

Even the Polish etymological dictionary them not exactly an honest or honourable peeps yea yea we know they had  a hard time but they just want the bling back they had 150 years ago... their etymological dic does speak of goodness...

The just maybe-magic just maybe of 'lofty intent.'..

unlike the English version of performing that whilst figuring how to stab you in the back when your dozing in your tent well away from any of them...

Even if they get a free pardon as they don't even KNOW that's what they're doing as they lost their simple philosophical cortex decades ago...

But you would have thought Mr GPT had some notion of The Sublime being a complext word and concept various scholars (as long as you dont include any of them except my many year customer Babb fellow of Oxford writing about...'it'...  THE Bible on it... a decade later " ughhhhh... i just cannot get there....volume three is what is IT??!!!....  but i do know one thing, it recreates itself every day..."

sadly the man i knew very well and had long engagements with over many years asking him please to share with the world what he was being paid to write thus far as he was dying.......who couldnt share anything despite being also Christian curate as he aged...

This is 15 years ago...

Anyway to the point Mr GPT not only had not one thought to share about the very subtle complexity in that world which DEFINES all art - the goodstuff... from the enlightenment...

it didnt even know what the simple (wrong) wikipedia version of the word was....

you aint got a HOPE in hell.....

when even ..... well

give up.

But i knew the future before even asking 'it' that test question.... and anyone who thinks that anything 'tech' can ever in any way have a fair mind is really stupid...

As it clearly was.....

(a decade of doing peace treaties between parents from 2006 - THE one group of persons who when you get their background one immediately knows they CANNOT compromise or listen or get over their own pathetic imnadequate arrogance was ALWAYS anyone in computing....  and then the very very close second place became any client i asked about their 'sprituality' if they said it was important and they only cared about manifestly good vibrations and healing all around...

infact errata they were as inhuman first equal as the geeks...no humanity in them...unable to understand that "sharing" a child means  with him/her too.... even if it was 95%  female child abductresses  with all those so so so c,lever even medical treatises on why mums brekky full of supplements and detoxins...

cant be replicated at dads and if Corro went there he would die immediately... but we still value dad as the beloved  equal spirit we prey to every day...

and thats no skit either...

funny things patterns.

Not funny when you find them to be templates for absolutely every copy cat

But nobody dare join the dots ....

maybe they cant see them.... good job i have a magnificent library of references blahh do blahh....

about the pasterregion...will keep me busy well beyond thisterone

I mean when you say to EVERY single landowner you work for witha  smile " if i die of a heart attack nobody helps us rural workin chaps  and most just nag and undermine as they clearly hate men i mean its been like this 20 years its not like any are original.......chuck me on the compost but i ask ONLY one thing you find Ralphs sickle and pass it on to lass.... " and you  just know that not one will have remembered your ONLY request of them.. even the next day

Anyway great art thats got a bit of Sublime sprinkled over it ... its still alive in my minds eye now and will be for a long time  as if i had been invited up to see the actual original 'etchings'

ohh yes thats a point maybe the 7.5% are honest.... i mean TRB a rare hero.... chief Gayman sing if you're glad to be.... cos of his superb War Baby

well it clearly  was a phase.....

as i hope his children have learned to make GREAT jokes about...

jokes cure all..... eventually

(but not being a Green under ZAc you will find when his first words in power were 'he should be locked up for his  kick it in the balls ...joke!" which is over my own line however as example to the peeps...only FREE SPEECH will save your planet....

pissin' on the polluters parade

and if Mister ZAc doesnt know that.... 

you havent a hope  even when hell boils away and your just left with a hard planet sized  ball of oxidised bathroom products 

(wow what a GREAT bit of imagery perhaps she can use but nobody ever ever ever believes they can really change and become even more sublime...) 

The Last Walk (as the one enjoyed talker couldnt be ... theres a word that rhymes with that ...but SHE told me to REMEMBER to prowl in HER woods!)

now...ALL literally ALL i care about is some beauty

but if one trudges through item two here, that rteally is THE one and only thing that therapises anyone even me....

All my words vids and audios have actually rather fine quickshot photos (from 15 years ago!) that quite poignantly also tell stories even if as i rarely emailed perhaps yes a few paras of poetical explanation makes them..understandable

 in my case that is rather not so interested in the 'mythical'

bullshit

But the real esteem - thats what its all about the endless for 15 years fat lanyardists bragging about how they are esteeming (or the ubiquitous Big Sisterspeak of 'empowering') people via their lanyards when it not only doesnt work like that

Its the exact opposite. As the only thing for many years i liked was being shyly pretty quietly unesteemed to bother saying much....

And even their endless 'empowered' will fall into the boggy mire at some point and being 'empowered' is the exact opposite of your rope ladder out

In fact the rope ladder to.... 'centredness' or whatever word is merely knowing over time that the you you ARE ...nobody can even imagine as you had to kindof pump the self up to become what you didnt become as deep down you are what you are...

but everyone will assume the exact opposite

and 'giving away' ones wish to do it in the beautiful version with lovely pictures is just as much the cure, to being human...

(as the battery wont last and that mode takes far far longer )

which everybody wants, but nobody dare ponder

The Third Sector (includes churches and all the slightly public cash funded). And The Source is their 'retreat', too. Poor Nigel won't have a HOPE of even understanding as they are clever unlike him

https://open.substack.com/pub/ralphschism/p/the-third-sector-includes-churches?r=2jdt8a&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

For the 'shy'; and true "centredness" for the brasher. The best real therapeutic 'work' of all the Jordans, Eckhearts, Gabors even Martíns and especially McGillchrists wont tell you, as they can't.

https://open.substack.com/pub/ralphschism/p/for-the-shy-and-true-centredness?r=2jdt8a&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

just a smattering i think they live with the above audios sort of even if every word for 3 years is all about oner same subject

sexist piggery

 yes him the once god,

a true once-poet

implyin that women are dilettante  foodies and care if their rice burns...

rather than care about  a good Montaignin' bitto nourishment over the aga

or on the floor if its clean as any American would demand will kill her if theres even half a germ left

anyway errata homopiscine...

Now the funniest thing ever was when a certain BBC VERY VERY  common as muck, everywhere, presenter polemicist, read out the data a few years ago:

" gosh well that rather surprising i thought it was far more maybe ten percent ...than the 1.5% gay/lesbian...." when reading out the 2021 sexuality census data

words to that effect OBVIOUSLY.. but unquestionable in that you could hear his tight bumfucked butt  - as he is CONSTANTLY reminding us, squeek on his seat.... [ a real man Douglas Murray even if he went very very wonky, when gaza hit the fan,  nevertheless i would listen to his material on freedom of speech for at least 3 years and had no idea he was 'gay' as a real man doesnt have to ever mention it..].."

so in fact it isnt the homopiscine 

causing extinction in more ways than one, with all them poppers and ky as they were always a statistical minority

(of COURSE if one looks at the data ["7.5% did not answer the sexual orientation question"]  one could theorise well maybe they were too scared but when the bbc has been  for years bringing out shows about the only gay in tghe welsh valleys being all happily out.... and anyway the first Tranny April Ashley moved to even HAy in old days VERY VERY bigot redneck and nobody actually ever mentioned herhimher whatever the latest nomneculture is...  

and anyway on his own BBC maybe 7 or 8 years ago a superb scientist who had lived 30 years with the rather randy 'if it moves fuckit if it dioesnt fuckit til it does' bonobos...  actually with them.... said " well as we know they do  do it up the back alley plenty but....every single one i got to know well meaning all my local triube at some point or other had a girlfriend too....  and bonobos dont believe in a lovely bucolic meander up the hills...its all or nuthin with them!"

furthermore surely by 2021 it became so so popular to try and join in with everyone else in every play and poem and drama and everything on the BBC demanding one is in this huge homo-gay (i though fine lovely lezzies were officially gaytoo? even i cant keep up even if it was wonderful seeing theior theme park around the toe clearly a getaway retreat to... perform everywhere holding hands... blessem but you cant ask a fat incomer clearly VERY unhappy woman being plenished sat oon the bencjh overlooking lezzie-central if its a thing as one ios hissed at " thats a very SEPARATIST  thing to ask.." all we were doing was figuring if the walking companion could blurt out something direct as she was pondering scientific 'experimentation' fuck they assume ... no man can ever even ask a nice  gentle question about reality - but i have a plan!!!)  tribe...

Anyway now 

for the last year (book ten) well in fact the next ten volumes

splendid many month chats witha  woman

recorded as we were 'working'

i mean not me i wouldnt for a second express my factual opinions on thge reality of anything wo/man....  her, she said " cripes not ANOTHER wrecking ball of a childless [middle aged] woman..."

her filmed expression told it all - scars, spear and arrow..

and also digital

and she is 'of' this land/tribe at least 20 years.. they are her so called 'friends'.

I am not interested in negativity even if its funny

only positivity

And.... even i was shocked when after we are deliberating several weeks how yes MALE dominated foodieism...

has wrecking balled once saneish society....

and as her business was being a foodie for hire despite also being on the dole...

(as her childless wrecking ball landlady SO SO officially eco worthy witch [the tennants words not mine or maybe that one was... yes it made my friend the tennat laugh]  landlady renting out substandard accomodation at an 'eco' retreat would have known as the dole paid her rent...to her.... (as was so so many times seen in Horrorfordshire from 2006ish) 

Anyway NO sins in the SW in any way interest me

(except the two new ones i have discovered regarding the only real woman i have known 100% glowing with total womanliness as she knows as she meanders the marketplaces of Northern PAstyland... pimpin her ghood book and splendid glossy broshure on SUNSHINE makes you live longer so you can go indoors to worship MY god on saturday even longer..."

"ehh Claudia isnt there a small contradiction in message ...well a bit of it...how about you repurpose your Hall for Tramps and you fat load of bourgeois moaners do your god thing outdoors... even better naked..as you are right with that doctrine in brochure number two...."

Only made her gorgeous Christian Soldier eyes widen furrther unblinkingly and smile even more the only real smile i guess i have encountered in all of here...

even if i am open to being proven wrong.

Anyway forget lost religious nutjobs even if the one lastereve was superb for real.... or maybe she wasnt maybe she just took their 'alms' 

well she did, only 3 quid but maybe was just the cleaner...

though a  superbly educated one.

i test

Anyway .... several spring months brainstorming topless on the most glorious even if polluted beach of all....

and i knew from day 1 when " i dont shop in supermarkets " was the usual lostgirl sad attack

(when you see later on a house packed full of WAitrose finest... nope Waiotrose of course isnt a supermarket...

in fact as i sat in jallopy in the lanes  errata byways of hidden Horrorfordshire early 2021  

i remeber exactly the moment

The first ever Waitrose van was spied meandering in....

even there, utter pestilent drug addled alcy shithole, of redneck mafia,  my nearest coop, Kington... (the ones who couldnt afford  smartdrugs addled Hay or  Presteigne   had to make do with from about 2015 or 16...  yes i must get to her soon.... what a pickup line AND she laughed!

(it was a test)

But all of that is irrelevent 

all i care about is quietly SHYLY being myself

(she sure wont believe)

and the utter miracle spiritual or  straight from the Holy Ghoster....

one cannot know

It is literally in the can just like that

the next day:

" god Babs.... this stuff on foodie bullshit taking over even sadman MAverick a bob the beefy oligarch's shitpipe builder brownosing to them with his so sexy brown smiley face....  he sneers at behind their backs... you have his number and my script how to lure him the one only man worth luring so you get the good seeing to you are clearly  well in need of too....[ this isnt made up real stories can't even be slightly sanitised or bowdlerised]...

"babs... i CANNOT in this universe of your stupid Oracle Girls frequency off the scale of sanity or any other write a whole film  script and paint word pictures of all the scenes crystal clear...just like that, or ever.... its NOT me.... i am a ponderous wistful poetical type named his lass out of Hooky's first equal Up To Me....

" i love Poliakoff the beautiful quietitude in his one about poignant pictures...a slow build..... and you did too....at least then listen to me....  arft takes years of being in the cauldron whilst the fake witches are trying to get you arrested for questioning their recipe...

" but it just came from nowhere  a whole film script whole thing characters you are in it as you want and need to be.... 

 its perfect...fully formed just like that when i woke yestermorn at 530 as usual and as usual waiting for 4 hrs for you to even get out of bed and get to work an hour later or hours if its a detox or supplement research day despite you lying about being 'au naturelle..' all of it....you are heroine who ...changes

its beautiful

right let me spend a day recording writing it up see what you think..."

response: basically "its genius..." 

in Cheltenham ladies speak which is  never say so but immediately make pages of notes on my script  about how we can bring it straight to screen as its brilliant and maybe her sucking up to Mister rich "blue ensign" yachtie those years and his actual oldman dick, ..not in Shitcreek-on-"Hateful"-drugs but where the real yachties pollute the seas, Cannes...

could be networked into something real 

Anyway yes all i care about is past material about past places...

And whatdyerknow some is really good - especially the foodie one 

which is far more fabulously Poliakoff or even dodgy Tom Stoppard than the two of them put together inb a fringe minority irrelevent movie about those so so many millions of gay men roaming the land being abused...

(perhaps they have had their 'turn' law is meant to be about proportionality.... even if an insignificant minority...and yes when the Queen - EVERYones favourite wine bar owner of Leominster with MANY gay men clientelle..... heard that her boys school had extended 'pride' week to 'pride month' very very very comp[ulsorily like ebven in assembly...even she said " ive now had enough this is much to far even here theres about three gay within 30km and they all come to my winebar  the only others we get are the lost ones from HAy where it seems they were lured...dragged in almost... "

" ehh so as you CARE...and as ALL of Leo loves you....why not stand for the council so you can become maYOR OR SOMETHING ADULT..... acc cap but... i know the Green party town and county councillors.... THEY nobody else THEY did this... its how they lure in Jerry and meander his arse all over the place for THEIR benefit only pretending he doesnt like the little whippings he will pay for rather a lot in London....in fact is victimised by them....    )

Anyway one can't even write her exact words or describe her expression which said  "i am a VERY reasonable pro homo woman  but this is far far too faR AND WILL hurt MY KIDS... i HAVE HAD ENOUGH"

OOPS ACC CAP

HURT

CAPPED ALL THE REST DOESNT MATTER 

But one cannot have all this cookery nonsense real men call food " fuck do i have to tell you one more time BAbs food is FUEL only.... brain food or JOBfood.... "

 even she couldnt listen the way they nag " but do you want the seasalt or ordinaruy ohh no i dont have ordinary... salt or anything.... ohh i see your cheap nasty coffee is there you must be mad to say that tastes nicer than my WAitrose as ...blahh blahh..."  which turned all Britishers into pathetic little private schoolboys who can only get 'love' via the spotted dick  they were forcefed at boarding school...as mummy couldnt handle being their nurse so Shipmanned them off ... away from any humanity
to board

(as Oliver JAmes alluded to but living so close to Oxford had to downplay) 

without blaming who really started it

even if one of a handful

 (so hated by my absurd little Cosa Nostran ex drug dealer bro in law, once business partner of, cofounder of.... as he didnt get the  same media attention as his once partner, money can't quite buy you..... especially in UK media run by jolly good  and quite ferocious, sex deprived... Cheltenhamates behind the scenes...as sure as ferrits are... )

still i am quite sure  playing footsie under the Olivo..or Olivetta... tables with the bbc media journos who lapped every drop of greasy olive oil falling of his sweaty brow (cocaine fuelled so often) making their sweat even more profusely

twas ever thus

But i dont think there is only ever one 'victim' in this world 

even if this first fallen Empire near 2 millennia on are Cosa Nostraing themselves almost as if in revenge

under the hem of even my lass 

so sneakily

such that you never ever know why .. the introductions

as of course really you can't have the one person who saw through the scheme 

at the same funeral or even in the will

(so glad i never had THAT poison chalice )

None of which matters really the only thing i knew 20+ years ago that mattered is if even a once ok Blackbusheist

hetoo never does anything

never means the words we knew quite well 45 years ago

as he's too busy sourcing the lastest foodie ingredients

Of course he never had time...to ever care about HIS PAstine

 seas all not very

clean

or in fact even care

But dont blame the women for starting this decades long 

all engulfin' latest addiction

all about the rice burnin' in the  kitchen

 

Now..

 there is nothing worse than going into a Proustian

stream-of-consciousness

stab, unthinkingly

 at the keys faux-poetically

even if its merely the greatest of all failures

("i want to meet a hunky poet " said she..

guess he must be strung out on shmaniac  

monetised bullshitto

unfortunately

never mind all the "second sight" 

as here and now is the real fright!

all metaphysics mere evasion

... avoidance, of the necessity to now, DO something

 - yes it can be 'saved' from him this bolshy nation)

And there is nothing better -  yes SO SO much you wont guess

energising powering this 

and the pondcasting, mess,

than at least one finest witness

on the same page.

One actually groomed and  manipulated into reading rather a lot of

"them" - the correct usage

other usages warm and loving vibrations of her loveliness

even if my ohh my some bits something of a mess

Nowt to do with me as i know the solution.

Its "care"-DO...

the  solution for being, you.

 But yes you wont find it in the liars' (thats plural, postrofixed after the s means both of them)  book

who's absurd publishers would have said

"nobody will give a fuck.."

And anyway don't frighten away the lovely tourists

(me middle of nowhere, on her hills

AMERICAN stars and stripes jeans walk on by...

no way do i even say, hi..)

"if you think their pongy chemicals are polluting muck"

But yes one fine woman

At least a  week between even showers first time thisteryear we met

did in fact and we smiled

Irrelevent.

One person's pong is another mans lolipop

(fuck i hope she reads thats funny

you had to be there

and it just came literally as i was at 'man's the next word manifested itself nowt to do with me

as i learned, errata was MADE to.." let the fuck go.."

anyway yes a walking companion

all one wants 30 years!

But at last someone to also share opinion

95% of walkers passed upon their PAstine pestilent 'PAth'

10 m after we passed them

" god did you smell that!?..... in fact i smelled her/ him as this is no longer sexed

30 m downwind 

s/he upwind ahead ...

how is it that nobody can even go for a walk even in full India/na Jones kit suggesting theyre here for the big one

without dousing themselves with loadsa bathroom products 

to come out here the main purpose being mainly to avoid other people..."

and most if not all ARE xenobiotics

meaning, nature does not know HOW to break down the molecules in many of our molecular concoctions

theyre all addicted to except her... 

And yes.... even a smallest droplet of your 'benign' deodorant

blowin on the wind

is not the 'answer' even if one

of all them

which are the only conceivable, solution

infact that's a point that first encounter

probably so pongy due still addicted to her deodorant

and all the other 'products' in her bag

my ohh my what some will do for some fantasy shag

pant pant

And then there is Ms worked in Superdrug

told me of her bees murdered by sprayers nearby her perfect acre

of course being polite and scaredy cat

i never did muster the actual courage

to say " Candy ....ehhmmm. that inch upon your skin

well..... one bit of that fizzin into the .... "

ahh yes thats the real point the scientists (still arguing about 

 ) are STILL arguing about a showoff newword  whatever it is the homopiscene  [fuck me trebble entendre in THAT one!] or whatever it is...

and that may be the wrong Sabine-porn clip as there was one around 2 mths ago where she wonderfully rants on about whether its the Anthropocene or not and in fact if my memory serves rather contradicts this one.. she saying NOT!.

....... THE PROBLEM!

the peeps are thick, political messages need to be repeated ad nausuem in a simple way...as science became politics decades ago... as is ALL human activity in a world where never mind climate change the mass extinction  due xenobiotics and oliveoil slicks.. gets worse by the day ...and your real problem is even senior YUMMIES of XR - the incomer one who would man the market place stand into my chronicling device actually said " ehhhhwww.. we dont do..[are FAR too good to do in humanspeak]...politics.."

in response to the simplest question:

"that Horrorfordshire council emergency climate motion last week.... maybe a start....but i wasnt there and been busy actually saving solo a wildlife refuge... so ehhh.... was it 'binding' or nonbinding' do you happen to know by any chance ....as Little Miss sexy XR i see you often performing in public here in Horrorfordshire......"

This recording when i get it out is the definition of why your 'Western' ..ie uk usa... planet has no hope...

if you ever ever believe any 'green' person you need a head transplant

Get a Bolivian one instead.

They know rteality... and thus women are 100% respected there always forever...as the women of Bolivia actually sacraficed

their real lives

to stand up to the yankee corps in 2003 trying to tax the rainfall on their tin roofs... hundreds died...

for taking a stand

and thus are the happiest women on the planet by far ive ever had the pleasure of.. just sitting for hours observing...

.

and XR can only bitch, about the correct question, ased regarding their brandname "Extinction"

why you will go extinct too

 

but nobody will DARE ever state maybe your bodily chemicals are creating in fact a 'smellyscene'  (i am intellectual and if i meet a scientist immediately can state hi from the anthroposcene  but we only iuse big words with them paid to uneducate kids via them)

in fact even Sabine who dooesnt know the science of desirability is prior to her hiding her age behind very very red lippy only recently she was so so so supersexy it was daft...now just looks ugly and sad

but yes the scientists  cant say " maybe my buddies too are using too much chemical stuff to just get off their couch.."  so they cant even decide if its the anthroposcene never mind waste another 50 years on is it in fact the smelly one...

 (one microdot of smellies even smaller than a microdot of Gweekian psycho drugs... will exterminate a fly as it tries to go and eat up some raw sewerage in her creek....  which also will exterminate it poor thing as there is no 'raw sewerage' its mixed in with prozac fatpil fatjab periodpain pills all of it.... nobody will ever speak about.... which is bizarre as sewerage per se is good for everyone especially the flies its what theyve evolved to  munch for din dins ...as long as its organic or should that be vegan poo....  one lost track decades ago of their neuroses.... one and all...)

Now...it won't make much sense ... for now

 100 nosey parkers

 doubtless so still pretending to be forever young wearing parakas 

purchased in some Ssswestern 'flea market'

where even the fleas run away crying at all the potions 

and fake emotions

never mind " fuck this for a game of soldier ants

fifty quid for a moth eaten pair of old pants.."

And poisoned by the doggie powders

(EVEN SOUTHERN WATER SAID a few months ago, quite rightly

" we cant cope.... your doggie [toxic fleapowder] 'dope'

ends up down the drains and can be scientifically discovered

right out at sea!...

you have to take some responsibility too...

what's goin down your draains and 

prozac pissin down YOUR loo!"

But of course whatever is the next 'formation'

of these 

(even if its hilarious 

the 'doctors' now rolled out

(bet theyve been paid a commission 

by the department of work n pension

" ... all these labels and little hissy fits, nefarious

labels and other normal life-sucks-then-you-die stresses 

[ i mean the poetic skill as i never have a second to think

a though bubbles up catch it before its in the sink

hole, of all the other lost thoughts,  

all of which i still have even from

pierces posts half rit 3 years ago

still active  alive, nonghosts

but rhymin hilarious and the exact right word nefarious

i never even use in real life

meanderin the hills ten years just to run into some 

just about acceptable two-per-woodburner Missus Wife..

But you cant use big words to their face

i aint stupid, 

fist job, find out if there are two stuck in place

where real rural peeps know that the meaning of life

is take down your mask, and if two visages

well at least  coordinate the messages

one hand writes and the other  seems to blow cold water innit]

shut up and get a job...

or else its hunger time

even if the Tourette's interferes with functionality of said gob ..."

ehh wahat was i gonna ramble on about

At least nobody can call me

ADHD

as evben the ministress of it

says " get a life"

but theyll never say due health and safety (their Yank insurer's ts and cs) backlash

two per cooker never mind motor, saves your cash

you can then spend on overpriced vintage

and carry on perpetuatin' the mintage

mint age....

of breath smelling 'nice'

due some sweetie

or very very aromatic  rice

and well the latterday vice

Im amazed he himself aint removed it

THE story of this pathetically precious century

only a truest ever genius  (century ends)

can get spatula, broccoli.... and clearly alliteration of what theyre up to

down and dirty under the 'hem of the night' as the rice is burnin 

their whole bourgeois castle of a house

down

And then..... domnt blame anyone else!

They casteratti'd him

Toned him down " or else dave..."

so yes it wont make much sense

but in fact the one lie i HUMBLY mutter over the last decade

was... " well im kindof writing about ten books, concurrently

which was sort of true but not exactly organisatedly

but then.... even if ONLY about lasterregion i wouldnt return to if you paid me

the necessary security costs of protection from badger exterminator

MAccurachs' ex SAS buddies 

(him vic to them twelve years if memory serves)

even if they were seen in them hills, these

But thats not the point

As in fact when you have nine books to finish about there

and then....

a last dull quarter decade here makes it ten

 Thing is my non existent ADHD

as even Starmerstan  wants to roll out default

" your ferkin parents FAULT"

but thats not inclusive of the 'looked after'

mentally murdered by Local Authority

only really  'manifests' symptomatically,

cos i aint got a socket just an old battery!

And in the meanest region ive ever known

all quarter of a decade even the bishop my supposed buddy

and her extremely expensively renovated home

never mind deny

my walkin companion

a ferkin address to which  can be delivereth a parcel  she needed from fuckin Amazon

(that was mine in fact ... 

but thats a more subtle mutual aid tract

being i donated 200 hours to her for free

attemnpting to save her from the doctors and  healers who never fixed her

by expletivating " if you wanna live another XMAS tart, 

see the kids afront your apron,  as your apron

 y'all endlessly hiding bihind.. next year

silly Jesus time,  too

well get walkin that fat arse

up and down The Track you live near....

even with...me"

(plus one or other of the very nice women also sourced as walking companion... why bother a death wish is a deathwish....)

Anyway..... every second though, of their gibbing (last ever usage of that obscure PAstine 

word as all they do is pine

 for something they never were

(EXACTLY like all 'Celtic' peoples everywhere

precisely Asterix was a real GAul

he wouldnt have gone cap in hand to Whitehall

" aww guv we need more cash as were all so so  to be...pitied.. got a mil to spare")

 has worked..

Because in my landloping

(ohh i do hope The Daughter may find it useful...it really is the solution:

the words do matter.. their harmony frequency and vibration

that one just says in fact its a word that whistles its own tune:

meanderin hill 

(i dont recognise the  showoff word 'moor'  theres just dry bits and

boggy... 

its either clear

or foggy

it really does say just whistle whilst you walk

or in my case talk to substack

sometimes

And the funny thing is in a load of waffles there are chapters - some extremely good 

i never for a moment thought i could

  that one day need tearing limb from limb

branch from poisoned tree

And put in the right order

collection

edition

and somehow bring back the gentle art of

sedition

all mountainmen farmers where  i was raised

knew that cheeky jabbin

scurrilous  word stabbin

is how you make new FRIENDS..

never mind learn to smile at

those bonkers lot that will be themselves to the bitterest end

anyway yes i have never in my whole life encountered such mean pouty peeps who  even if ladyBish, never even ask you if you the 'traveller' 

need anything, practical

and the one time you ask

you find out the real key to their horrid kingdom

of litteraly nothing but PR

spin... 

 hiding genuine sorrow and angst

wityhin

them all

oops thats great  - the keything.... only one on my keyring

to Segway now back to the beginning

thats already in audio a day or so ago

 

But i have a BETTER theory.. thats just bubbled up

 

René Girard: The Catholic thinker influencing .. the sad 'tech bros' who couldnt get a girlfriend in their teens

or ever get Lesley U (the sex bomb of the whole Vale of Clywyd and hills) up into the hills alone that one time .. especially after she gets HERself in the papers as  winning the 'Beauty of The Vale' competition to self-objectify her amazing ones... which us alternative actual counterculturals  decried..

unless said 'melons' were available... up there in the bracken that day (after 5 years of dull Cider Rosying foreplay )

So, theory from 20 years of practice.. the practice of, ...

(observing the REAL behaviours of many especially female incomers  to the actually real rural aside lands.... the DSW being merely all a  suburb theme park  and thus a great martyring sacrifice to meander here for... FAILURE... which in times is the only actual mindful zen and esteemy thing (audio soon from lasteraft)

observing just how really unhappy they all are by any reasonable measure...

so the 'mimetic's are the devils tools .... as the ACTUAL newculture of the late 70s knew even in the bleedin sixties...

but hotdam i have forgotten my link its bubbled back down... not popped..it will come back, as i need nothing...well,  except one thing

and the only things my dull boring mission of 20 years  things...sss. i cared to influence a bit, and failed are both linked:  ONLY psychologically healthy youngsters can  future protect their 'environment'  .. FACT ...some bearded Tarquin who was fucked up it by Edward St Aubyn's dad as his splendid memoirs speak truth of... or just ordinary pigeon fancier type of humble one,  whos drunk mum back in Hull tortured her for her kicks... cannot ever do the HARD many year consistent work of politicking the powers that be or ...come...to the environment, to make cash from it,  into behaving as per the CURRENT LORE...

only psych healthy kids become just about effective nature stewards,,,, (eg all of Surfers Against Sewerage clearly were abused or kiddyfiddled with as they fail in everything except luring a  deviant younger St Aubyn  heiress to their barbies... all they really ever wanted)

simple fact.

And thats the real reason theres simply no hope for them hills them rivers them birds...none of it

its a simplest possible one way circular economy

called they cant get out of that used bathwater flow that drains down the plug..

a whirlpool of them (i know who should pain it my ohh my her glorious funny art is still bubblin' up in me today)

thats not the theory!

i have zero interest in  any of the above, all failed....

merely to discover a few little cutesy new yogi teabag worthy  aphorisms ... but the real ones we actually did need...

As their first edition really did fuck it all up bigtime..

(i have arty mounds of them i saved over the years one day to turn into art )

the first simple sayings included my only commandment say what you mean mean what you say, and a few others as  wise..

But then as they expanded, became successful ... god the desperate need to perpetuate their cash register ..ping... almost the exact opposite of their first slightly wise sayings started to bubble up everywhere.... . that would be a great arty image too)

this is NOT my new theory as i have still forgot it..

for now

Escape the goat...ee bearded "victim"

 Righty ho nobody scapegoats me as ...

The thing is i know I am average (even if almost everyone my age group is way below average in respect of what we can do rambling up into the hills three times a week, no stupid wanky walking sticks, nor unnecessary wellies or walking boots unless  - yesteraft -  one is to enter at last her rather magical woods...  almost come what may  - illness bugs whatever  just walk on....)

But average what? 

I think io have it.

As it is quite simple their supposed trendy new philosopher  and his 'mimetic' this that and the other, is TOWNY!

The fat London priest of course we have had to tolerate for several decades since he said one thing at London 'Occupy' of course is too fat and towny-wobbly to THINK...

"maybe.. this so called genotype .. mimetic innateness... is innate in US townies..[only]. cos the townies learned how to suck up the oxygen all of it decades ago... well in fact at least a  century ago... and get to write crap DeBotty type books..... as the publishers are too fat and fearful of a walk in the countryside so they only like their 'type' they also don't like.."

Which one cannot theorise as innately all sociology is done by students living in towns many from towns... by professors living in towns...all by choice.

Whereas some of us  age 10-18 living lonely lost landloping the hills even if at times meaning a flock next to a very highup range of hills we had grazing rights to  -  a REAL shepherd  (my flock had thousands of 'common' acres upon which to roam before quads made it just a joyride ) 

.... i have never wanted ANYthing that any other person i have encountered has... nothing ever...

And my famous theory the 'tech bros' can have for free is all one ever wanted was their crap to work and stop updating into nothing new ever...

And all this 'desire' of what others have in the third person...is a towny neurosis NOT innate human attribute,...as if one is in ones formative years in nowhere places one learns to be a real human and not need anything...

(except the usual,  innate

mate) 

thister morn a first ever awoken by a bee buzzin around my head at 5.20 when i wanted a sleep in ...bastard nature should all be exterminated and... anyway  

René Girard: The Catholic thinker influencing Silicon Valley

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m002n10g

And the one thing above all you dont desire or need..is to be ANY towny persons victim or escaped goat or anything ever in their poor Eastenders infected ..heads...

And at last i met my very very favourite maybe-religious babe or rather old bag...

wow we had a chat lastereve talk about a 'romantic' setting... just her and i in the bigjob... " so cmon whats the heating bill?" 

It would be extremely inappropriate for me to even George Borrow her words as she was extremely rude about her own.... gang

So i turned it onto 'positive' language rahh rahh happy clappy

And all my materrial is a life-cult rather than the death cults all around sadly especially in Hatesville all i wanted was to do ... was just do a rescue mission and then head to the High Mts of serbia well not really ehhh high Mts of Portugal far safer when it comes to roaming bands of homoerotic marching singers 

" whatever the rest may say and i love it you think they can schism the fuck off and die in hell.....  i think its lovely you have a babe arch pointy hat....i really do and hopefiully she can whack some botties as as a bloke every time i put the wireless on and hear of yet more lost sheep gone pervy it makes me feel ashamed to be a bloke ....[ she agreed!]..   how interesting you say that ' of course the bible doesnt want a babe in the high seat...cos 'it was rit by a load of blokes..'. what a wonderful insight...! such a shame i have never met any Christian except you who can ever think outside their little death cult of a black box...  and isnt such a fanatic they can actually have a real equal discussion between equal humans...wow.."