... fuck its here the ultramagic
the sat in a horrid little London-on-Creek side alley of showoff Humvees and fancy shitpipe builders
mates
here now
She ...her smile ... theres me
if only she knew
I am not embarrassed to be job-interviewed in my undies
except those ones.
retrieved from my ' ecological' bogs lasterautumn some showoff sunglassed 'dude' couldnt even manage to see
he'd left his showoff undies behind
i do NOT wear labels ever especially when all the fine youngsters even here are label0infected with their " my teacher says i have adhd" when at
twenty one or three
i have never heard such a confident and fine communicatrix
" and they only spent 250 quid on plants the whole of lasteryear..."
live camera action (artists paintybook in windscreen as disguise)
oops not that only captured as the absolute fakery fed every day into their screensaver or whatever this nonsense is called ...
they all became islands of twatomisations dreaming dreams of rocky cliffs they pretend are 'natural'
like Fakebook did to her...
And shame
actual real shame
(BJ the interstate intestate Queen of Grub .. "tiurncoat is the most beautiful word in the language" and i riffed upon several months ago... and she knows what it means..)
i may never get over.
Anyway i must stop hatecriming one specific tin pot alley
The thing about Gwerk is it is so conformist with ANYwhere.. the ex London junkies invaded and repurposed as their hideaway " mummy i have found this great 'healing' community to heal in away from all the hurly burly and full of only nice healer people... can i have my trust fund now [to buy her rotting houseboat cheap... as no one actually has any real friends or allies places like these...as was the case in HAy once they found theretoo... as real friends in real fringe places, with few resources all after the same berth or patch of land...cheap.... they real ones help you patch up the rottin' wood before it gets too rotten... so the next conman can come along and con you out of your stuff on the cheap with his or more likely these days her Eisentsinnian smile ooh thats rather poetic too.... ... no matter WHAT you think of their chakra or astrological charts...or your 'style' of communication or even 'attachment' they all seem to prejudge on day one...]
All the same... just different star ratings of drugs ... especially up at his fake hippy camp campoin' it up on the hill above her swamp
pretendin' to be my friends ... full hedgehog disclosure, even takin' said hedge up to their so predictable boho-bbq showin off the latest foodie sauces and all that before the lets have a nightcap of deathcap drugs... ...
and then next time you pass on the creek..its as if you never met..
Anyway... one doesn't even want to utter names or places such as Gweek... it hurts
Even if my ohh my the actual true real joy - i have meandered 10 years giving little bits of my boring 'story' so dull you couldn't make it up, to random occasional interviewees...
but to give her - as i told the bigjobs lasteraft
" a true intellectual doing artistic official research wonderful young woman randomly day before.... and i saw...her transitioning.... she told me just her to me.... how she feels on her first few ventures out on her new oldish vw van it was SO SO perfect to meet 'us' - i was meetimng us way back when we were virginstoo.... .. a mere lass same age as mine.... . just beginning, just stepping out tiptoe first step..' when i get in it and out of my folks place i.... feel alive... the weight lifts from my soul... it felt impossible just a few months ago but then i just DID it,....and now this small space is my only real home AND yes i feel super creative in the zone in the only now.... but its more than anything that there was no way i could SEE this as possible it was frighteneing and too much.... but now just a few weeks later
its second nature.... [ "yes i can see not via youtube made up performative bad comedy.. this became you you became this... truly free"] .."
.... so i told the potted quick swampside version:
" so you on mapping human scale mapping or finding new ways to describe the land .... maybe think about this... i turn up shitcreekside spent last cash on emigration no idea anything about this dire Pastyshire being stolen by the hedge funds and as we used to call them 'trustifarians'... and actually fearful levels of drug munchin mad people ... you can never trust not to smash your headlights if they think you are moving in to Gweek as new dealer in town parked up aside their polluted shitcreek.... so.... livin' on little wanting to maybe see if.... if... just go onto 'hold'.... if you remember June July 23 not a drop of rain for months ... so i had to gradually .. well ... vagabonding here and there...on the way to awful supermarket shitfood town Hellstoned or occasionally .. Foulmouth ... if the latter a real dump aside the road to sometimes empty poopan ... and 5 km before one seemingly clean stream to fill up water... shower...now strip off under the Gwerk bridge but only at lowtide dawn as if seen arrest for streaking or whatever anti-'human' folk lore they have nowadays about the English cannot dedal with human bodies... ok theres a line but England world centre of false allegations no knowing what will be made up justa bloke needs to have a wash with ecover in shitcrfeek feederstream.... 'borrow' some eggs from 5 km up the road ... they kept me alive some weeks.... but for gods sake watch out for hidden cameras...
...in short over a few weeks i had to develop this whole 'territory'.. not to plinder but to live in harmony, with as you say.... and down there its 100% facsist for the 99% here so one had to be so so careful...not seen regularly at the same stream...etc..
and guess what it certainly did .. expand my small peabrain seemed to grow a little ... my mental 'map' kept me just about alive .. a bit of gentle gathering.... dont shit in my own backyards etc etc... ahhaaa i think thats food for your phd dissertation to be.... as on your face, i see..."
was truly lovely
But the young it's their planet and our lot failed to even protect bought-boho central
too busy on Instgram selling fake 'energy'...
and anyway i had enough of even that name-word - exactly the same as Presteigne Clun HAy-on-Wye... even if Gweek, if the goddesses give the aforementioned trip advisor 4 1/2 starts on the pseudeia.com rating site.. Gwerk gets a 5....
(i have the stories - ONLY of those born to a British passport - i would never ever ever pick on immos especially if committed no matter what ..if nothing else but to their memory - meeting only one actual real genius in my whole life, only one... even if they curated her to be pet, and not bite.. " uk should be in the HAgue queue before my ex gaff..." of course you cannot say even in 'polite circles' around his druggie campfire up above her shitty creek.... why she spat at me... cos truth of what actually BEElieved.... gets in the way of the sales operation it all became.... ALL....and one cannt 'frighten the horses' of the neighbours who are the only ones stupid enough to waste 500 quid on weekends of retreats ...with dance sessions... never mind buy the hocus pocus they seem to all think they need to reserve the right to monetise...;...one day maybe....when the dole office sends to you cleaning lady inc or else... )
Anyway yes....
Tin pot vudu...
piss pot creek..
prozac pee (wait i have scientific recordings to start logging, soon)
And my ohh my they would slash your tyres as am minimum if you were thought to be acid piss rainin' on their sad little parade..
(you needed to be there the way the local pissed and stoned man was when he did kid handover one morning just aside....me... no one cared of course..they daren't...that takes TIME.... better spent sellin' fakery on Insta marketry... dressed up as everything BUT sales pitchery....)
Anyway yes...
golly i am new age poetically potty today
BUt some words need no repurposin' nor rewritin'
why didn't i think.
They are all exactly the same
And i have zero interest in anywhere or anyone this region - i only came to (figuratively) kid*ap - you probably cannot even worldplay with that word in this utterly lost to richness of playful language BEST language in the world to do that in...pone dimensional land of mutes... who only hear in what you write what you never would.., or should i say rescue... then escape..
Every single one of these places became just a carbon copy of the theme park set up In Hay though i think one por two places not too far from Glastonbury may have been similar too...
the same boring expensive cowboy hats but of course never quite the same brand
the twatomisation of all the same...uneducated (As education is via the GREATs who came first from George Elliot to Tolstoy through Turgenev to Yevgania etc Rachels Cusk and Kushner even if theyre abit depressing reality-speakers... ... magnificent MAry Shelly... ) predictable old age model of chuck a bit of vudu and some cool CAmden MArket type rags into the 'alchemic' mix on the oven and you get a heartless tasteless load of poison that will nourish no one....really
so they all guzzle drugs to get over
themselves....
except they never do
change the menuj!!!
Anyway yes... shitcreek really was always just yet another
tin pot
ten a penny
and the only real talent there
unlike Stevie and JC -( ahhhahh someones initialls must actually be attacked for what he did and still will.... to his only neice...who could have been as almost as good as Stevietoo..if not for... to be cont.... )
never learned to TRULY...let go....
All the way no matter what the pong
..