So... the whole point is...

 Not 'magical' thinking' even if at last a few weeks ago i stumbled across an elderly  fan of Gabriel Garcia  here in the hillocks...  she from his muvvaland and  she alone does indeed get the whole thing of 'living in the moment' that really only Gabriel managed to get down propper..

yeah live IN it, but still have her as final objective....  and he got her into his big riverborne campervan at the end..of it.. the true magical nutjob tract. The most absurdist optimistic road trip of them all... with a happy ending. 

As Columbians know, Love in The Time.. far more thrilling and real

 (we discussed the usfulness of the widow sortin' out the Flozz - its what widows are FOR! using all that death pain The Widow  Naz havin' lost her love .... and passing it on  - her existential death angst,  for the benefit poor young virginal man's MUTUAL benefit...as the MEDICINE hetoo needed....as a fine mother knew and thus bridged the Naz into the spare bedroom, to sort out her lovelorn lad.... thats propper parenting! ) than Time Out approved, dreary and pious,  Hundred years...

Anyway 'inspired' by a fabulous young van-borne philosopher (i can give no higher a compliment than the 'p' word..)

it is time or was yesteraft to call out the terrible parasitism that #vanlife 'creators' use as their grift... that has really done so much damage to the female psyches of those rightly pondering get the ferk away from the psychos...

https://www.ralphschism.com/p/the-pros-of-life-in-live-in-vehicle.html

Now.... oops then but i bet even moreso now

 The offices.

Many.....' hot desking'.

And listening  to the ( as one would say in the 80s, though i never read it) News of The Screws...

The often quite interesting radio 4 chan program Sunday, on the cash and power behind the various nutjub organised religions 

Stourton's rather good dour delivery missed ... him popping his clogs this year

But today another frankly ....

ehh no disrespect to the victims....i rescued one 2013..it took nearly a year of hard work.. her lost to the ' cult' to quote the CPS, of  happy clappy evangelical nutjobbery     that overwhelmed even Horrorfordshire...

This  latest badboy  in his frock, doin' em bigtime for their cash, too...especially....

Now, literally this second

 Or five minutes ago..

As long as I can still do that....

And ... the funny thing, a perfect 45 minutes afternoon nap, in the perfect unseen place.... it even bolsters one beyond the ultimate rule .... of don't even think for five seconds of anyone younger  than the golden age of maturity, being of much use to anyone ....

And awakening to ' the first book' on the wireless... a reminder, of the obsession so long held... which is still the problem.

To be vont

But....

 I do hope all the several thousand meanies just know for one hundred percent sure that there is no way on earth any true ultra-bounce, beauty never mind one with the greatest ever backbone, armed with a whackjob  with which to metre out great violence- even if not dancy-deft enough not to break it...

Couldn't imagine that she may have been playing with me....

And jousting, upon a welsh mountain hilltop, for...

I know not what, yet

But she's been adding in too,

musically, 

i know  not why...

but i do know: " luv....you can sing all the folk songs about the baddies you want

and so beautifully....spattering me with the cost of your art

but i bet you daren't write one about the reality...

even you the ultimate cleanin' lady....

just wipin' the arse spatter of the tourist rather than come and 'elp a landman

dig  the land you sorrowfully songstress,  lament is lost

well one of us will 'ave my trench as grave

.....  but not the way Lorna went...... from indeed the dance, and you bloody started it!

and as for you supposedly fasted-hand.... that's a sale-or-return

see if she lives up to the advert version

uncommitted only half the way.

As we riffed... that eve at dusk.... over there someone long ago he made it clear

it was me or nuthin... 

not even life but i'm NOT a cynic i know he aimed to not shoot the new wife

it was a ferkin aiming error

poor thing i bet she  died of terror!

he meant to get him...his rival for the most beautiful of them all

even if all guns should be decommissioned as soon as possible and i will have to borrow a shotgun, and some blanks....

what are you doing... temptressing me?

i thought you're pledgy-troughed

 even if, thanks

you proved i am still very much alive"

So, how does one even begin to entitle - that's the real version of just stickin' a label on

 a bit of a new start....

Having.....  well the observant may have seen a lil' note a month or so ago..

' hmm.... odysseys are such rediculous fun, 

and when eroto-homo plasticated Nolan 

goes and remakes it into the worst uncluture in history

 well, he just don't get odysssian gonzo ferkit therapy

works.

When they all are drowning in their swamps of control

(maybe 'cept her.... we shall see one day, but to be in the Odd essay

you gotta earn it with at least, a nice cup of Yogi tea

the the bossy lil' controlin' label torn off as that's when IT began,....)

Now....so new phase

ergonomically efficient method

acting new system..

nearly in place.

But of course letting go means what do i care about seeming a nutjob

as ... well... you didnt meet who i met laster dusk...

such a  rediculously smiley lil' smiler...

And smiley mum...

maybe on the run.

At The Atch... ("its gyppo for stopping place, stop, breathe....smile.. all the fascists on your tail, 

so lets sit and figure what is your tale)

But back to yesteraft

Maybe she is old enough to discern?

"So never mind Page turnoff James

Did you sit on his knee?

I always think of it as made in your garden shed, just down the road from us

sorry farm, barn

well... are you old enough now...

never mind ina  state of Independence,

to ask the cunt if he had given up his badger baitin' habit by then

just to 'fit in' belong

with those awful stone age 'men'

no rumour of backstab

in twenty twenty year of our Lord above

heaven, i even had time to ask his 'motorised lump of lard'

tour manager buzzin around my old yard

into my recorder chroniclin' device...

"soo ehhh.. your Stevie, maybe he could help on a local badger Holocaust, 

those Mucky Currachs down the church, and [aristo]Harley adjacent

not quite so nice

as their painted on concentration camp guard smiles

pretend.....  Jcb burried alive a whole megga set

somewhere not too far from here....maybe he could help me with at least a symbolic song"

" ehh....well... perraps not... moving  out here...

well ... lets just say he was on the other side of that equation...

needed to fit in with the lads down the pub..... 

a few pints and off to show off their concentration

as to who can terrorise the most brocks, in their  ancient habitation"

but we shall come back to that another day

This day, there is new work to do..

the ultimate legal case, for the ultimate splendid ... 

fine van ..babes in the woods.

'now' is becoming or HAs become a weird out of the blue, problem

 the problem as always the 'language'

wow it came back! so i was bobbing around as usual full bounce saving your  blog for you in the cheap seats,  with some rare intense communications on the go, too....which never happens, and just like that Ms FAery goes and gives me a better line!

And i forgot to write it down.... when New York called... and what a truly wonderful talk with an old neighbour..

" so....you sold out thats what new york as caller id means babe....  so... ehh... your step monster ... let me tell you about the night she, with her antique leather boots - she the first of them Sybs who invaded the once safe MArcher Hills....you were BORN up the Estianddad hills Craswall blck mountains  we living in the second highest run down old farm...

wow we MUST be loyal...pure loytalty real hill peeps know what that means.... before Mister Junky set himself up up in the highest inherited farm above mine rented  and  yours next one 2 km below....

" and his parties attracted the drug squad who would keep us up at night as they circled by chopper like ferkin vietnam...

anyway the step... the night she came and offered herself to me even if lonely and unfulfilled all those years ago there.... 

and it was a shock as i didnt have any faux bohemiana about me....

I couldnt...

not only because she was a married woman.... 

now... you've grown up... THE BOOK ...the real one...of that 100% fake society...needs writing...

and i got the notes...."

Now...oops OWW!

just thinking of his unletgoness hurts even if nothing hurts me 

A new free, no Tolles, here, ultra  proven to be true bit of waffle on 'letting go'.... 

 https://www.ralphschism.com/p/letting-go-free-user-guide-for-load-of.html

however i am the ultimate absurdist in that there are as usual other threads woven in....such as how the vandals of Oggle are (randomly nothing to do with free speech)  vandalising this big million word splurge.... soon. 

Almost all i care about.... and yet..

And probably nobody will tolerate the fabulous free version of all that which for twenty years the Tolles and all the rest merely copying alcoholic Alan Watts so unletgo he couldnt let go of the bottle that killed him... so you wont hear the latest stories.... (within) one a fabulous yestermorn riff by someone else on 'love'. And i learned something interesting i really admire now...

All Britolites seem to have lost

In their craven desperation to hang on....to everything that matters..not.

(to be cont)

God i hope she wakes up....  imagine: " fuck i had the double dose. my last rites my last thoughts my last big MAc or whatever..... i was gone...  and... ferk is this the afterlife !! ..."

America: even if UK would be even more nasty and gag her speech 100% forever.... if she does will they even allow her to know

 "babe you became one of the most famous babes in the world while you were a gonner....  the world was holding its breath - if fascist mad Farage adjacent nutjob  for your death; if humanist for...ok surely by now she's had enough 'punishment'....  enjoy it...even if we wont ever let you out to even do the tv interview..."

Now that's what you call their dumbed down 'universe' 'aligning'

 At crack of sparrows, on the wireless....

The One ....whom made it all about " I am in control of my death... and demand to be.....!" 

And another   the one person on the planet least in control of her death...

Even if talk about cruelty letting her wait thirty years for it...

.....the one who was given her last injectable, twice so they report....won't die"!
That's Life...

Now..in respect of the former...one has listened for years to the worst rhetoric ever...

That all emanates, drip drip drip.. like a YAnkee injectable, from Mister Curtiss's  Century of the Self..

Where he blames just about everyone else everything else.... other than the next word: control.

" i must be in ...control...." 

Of my own interior design, not only in the new flat but of my fat head...

And even if I am quite sure even the supposedly educated Esther won't have bothered noticing, that, say Tony Judt...well he was locked in a corpse on his death bed for quite a few years... and yet desperately fought via every last wink of his eye - he used to operate a writing machine, the only bit of him left working.... to SPEAK...communicate... teach.... whats what! write up via just that wink his memoirs his learnings..
 The real version... to pass on to the next generation his years of doing the work... and no matter what pain or horrors he lived he wanted every last imaginable second of his life no matter what. When years earlier many would have asked for him to be 'put out of his misery'.

Never mind Monsieur UNtouchable... who wanted to die so badly he employs a hoodlum to not pity him and ideally expedite it..But it doesn't quite work out to his so perfectly controlled, plan...

... to be cont, the real plan to get to just how 'narcissistic'  and Century of ITself obsessed, the environmental movement of the last decade is..using one example. Hay-on-Wye.

In a bit...

Now THE last JOB i want to turn into an art work

 As it is about the art of compromise, even for the useless browsers of the internet, who are so thoughtless they must be bots..

And thus won't even be perturbed by being told how way way low down in the foodchain of people pleasers they are, compared to the Surrey girl who came to live on the River Arrow.....not far from where i used to live....

Cons everyone she  is going to set up an 'environmental organisation' with her inherited cash... a mere half a mil maybe thats what the chip is on her shoulder..?

The Queen people pleasing gibber... ahahh that sounds nasty, well not really as I remain in contact with her, or did...AND her very bestie mate chubby incomer both i met at the same time as they ran away from the SE in 2020... when after thirty years they fall out.. (different auras or chakras or whatever made up excuse for hating themselves is these days)

But a few months ago arose a clever ruse

To have them both working on an important project. A REAL ultimate bridge that various have agreed is groovy - two from opposing sides collaborating to create a book about a tragic incident ... this summer on their underwhelming moors...finding some neutral decent joint opinion in writing...even a top PR said "wowser what a great idea.." 

 healing....  or at least philosophical....

But there's one thing you really cannot fix, and that's obviously many years even before she came with the rabble to play country girl ... and never ever put anything 'back' ever..lies deceit bullshit..

one tolerates.. if one day it may make a most fab 'case study'... libel proof as she knows... the complete and utter pandemic of people pleasing which is obviously a neurotic reaction to inadequacy so its to be empathed ... except there's no point as theyre all at war with each other the last 2 or 3 years  who is the Queen Empath

rather than EVER DO anything real...to ever actually augment any real issue in the non towny regions..

i know i have the chronicle..

Rachel cusk i think began to question the rural (majority) in her first few books i loved em... and she concluded, hmm a bit wonky but i cant really say why

thing is it got SO much more interesting..far more so than sill cities..

And nobody ever tells the actual truth of it all..i call that very Orwell and co

anyway back to her... really its not changed since feudal times at all even the swishy 4wd Misteress of HER own Lil' Universe...

Its all based only on jealousy.... secretly lusting after a bigger castle... while pretending their 'energy healing' works..

or even i bet in her case money launderer... as i jokingly said so many times just to survive the way they are one and all so so boring, and predictable...every single one

 but no more there's no point - not one of them even when a few weeks ago says FAB ..  "and i know the book world.." 

ever ever means what she says

Why the rural lands died a long time ago....

And the only hope was ever (hence Mister Schism four years back) forgetting they ever existed and attempting to roll out the chronicles..of them... far far more interesting than even the greatest book of them feudal times... Mister Stendhal and his Scarlet and Black...  exactly fist equal with georgie and her silas... both remarkably similar deep down.. 

just about pride

and being stuck in the stone age

or pre dark ages really when i'm sure they couldnt collaborate either

so all that really matters is the jobs

 

and fixing gets done no matter what

and as for on the cliff edge therapy a skip of books about to be chucked in the ocean

( they do that in the provinces as all the fey schoolteachers even 20 years ago as was well known so wussy risk aversey ....no To Sir With Love in one of them!! failed to teach their kids to fight  

ooh it is fun listening to trenching radio   . keep One connected... and listening to the fine Frenchie yoof   

yes they taught the rural youth to feel special slash entitled  to plenishystuff when decades back Horrorfordshire became about whose dad sold a wrecked  barn ( they were too lazy to maintain)  to a yuppie for a million and might get him a GTi or whatever they have now   

to get really nasty to the more  fluffy  lit who are in their way  and overtake blind bends thus increasing the death rate of said teens way above the mean...

cos they feel meantoo....

especially about book ' learning'.. 

as one so often merely sighed at...

.

ahahh but the most enjoyable fix...next

cures any ' stress' or worry . 

So, what you have to DO...

 to save the films to save the many thousand read or browse material

all very plenishy ....eventually

even for you

or you must be mad to return. By the thousand

THE hardest of all rural jobs

real trenching, deep and mucky

is how you make the best beds for next year

and yet half of them come in and think pilates is the only way to sweat... of course you can do it in a nice group of the same too scared to go out and find out iof their elderly neighbour needs a dig over perhaps..

as one has seen for years

once those bijou cottage ulgrades began

" be the change..." they all say..i have yet to meet one who recharges their batteries NO matter what.... or they may pretend, until their yurts run out or Prozac...

 

nor does one ever find ANY parent attempts to make their kids keep reading, no matter what

even paying them to is better than the alternative

and i can't even find the time yet to find the pictures among many thousand of the library in all its glory ....1000 ish books collected over the years... even when ... dot dot dot

https://www.simonclayton2020.com/2026/09/appeal-estis-library-i-must-rescue.html

Those Oracles...

 

So every spiv Oracle Girl, Charles Eisenstein,  never mind awful 'therapists' either invaded the Swetsern Lands, or if they couldn't afford thirty grand plus, an acre, to put their yurts up on and attract the Party crowd from Snotty Hill, when they get bored... ended up in The Marches (where they also guzzled pukka proper London cocaine at Christmas from 2007 or 8ish..the dealers - errata great mates from back home,  need time out, too....) 

Thing is all of them not one with their endless 'work on tghis and that and whatever voodoo ever speak of the actual PURPOSE of their therapies or what the not...

para one of quite a few 

which all trickles down into a range of recent pages and collections

I know work...

https://www.simonclayton2020.com/2026/08/the-opposite-of-emotional-cripplegate.html

https://www.simonclayton2020.com/2026/09/now-sunday-morning-and-her-eyes-dont.html

and all sorts that riff back to 

https://www.simonclayton2020.com/p/the-wound.html

as i know exactly the universal rules one discovers by living them, of how to actually evolve ...even if its slow.

But until i get the libary saved

https://www.simonclayton2020.com/2026/09/appeal-estis-library-i-must-rescue.html

 and back on the road....so small a thing in fact as I've never had such a contented year just seeing what does emerge as really worth sharing...and just how much iof a pickle so many are in...

time wasting

Is a GREAT purpose i did know was THE purpose 5 years ago...

And if it can't be...nothing 'comes up' that's not how the faeries work, the one greatest reward is you know exactly why the whole of society went brittle, and un-cooperative (even the farmers realised they must share plooghs to stay alive the last 5ish years) 

Cos yer all deep down Maggie fans...

Even if pretending to be all Pandy and cuddly

Exactly the same as America....you all slag off,  what a dull life..

Which will always stay dull as i know as it cracks which it will.. Trump wont be favouring UK in the diesel rationing out...

I shall not even bristle with any emotion, as i know what the tricks are...

Having been forced to live them several decades.. 

now.. infantilising, is the actual word for 'charity' whereas teamwork and solidarity to just for example work on how one politics against an unaffordable housing regime..is really adult.

this

https://www.ralphschism.com/2026/09/charity.html

will one day merge with this new page...

https://www.ralphschism.com/p/the-greatest-reset-will-be-art-too-some.html

all i know is if the next generation dont learn from our ;'struggles' - the real version, theyve really no hope

As almost all is universal and unchanged since feudal times,,,

except the planet has run out of clean bits for the creatures to thrive... 

even NAomi figured that 20 years ago and i adore it that i have a splendid chronicle of how no body listened even if they may have paid twenty quid to be SEEN hearing her speak at some 'festival'  - or isn't she as sexy as Yannis who of course got his slot at HAy Festival...

As that's always what it has been for 200+ years "for The English to see...". so said those fine Portuguese..

'CHARITY'

phew done even if 'with errors'

how....ever... two birds one stone

 

So...charity - i have a great big essay on this brewing a long time

A decade ago or more it was obvious that every fake charity in the world wanted to set up in The MArches - far enough away from the inspectors...

so i have loads of chronicling that...

But where it matters is the environment - i am sure there are at least three or four different separate megalomaniacs with their OWN lil' charity just for one poor river, The wye...

And then as in Nairobi about 100 charities per square foot of their slums...

And i never realised that the dream of every middle class escapee from L'Oreal land is to set up a charity..

each withs eperate back office, each with own accountant ... each with own fancy furniture if they get as big and fat as CAmilla BAtty Gellish..

when the environment would be grateful and doff its cap if there were just ONE big one that did its job properly...

rather than literally thousands now...

all of which usually fold within a few years when Camilla and Rupert have a baby or get their adhd 'diagnosis' or Camilla doesn't like Rupert getting angry at all the things he has to fix...

However.. the REAL parables are yet to come...

And we have a whole world of Sam Harris and them tech bros 'conscious giving' or whatever their buzzword is...

Here is a great example of how charity is worse than a waste of time unless very specifically talked through and quid-pro quod..

a roofless person especially in the meanest county in Christendom - PAsty land.. with about 20 old hard drives (lots of film soon - i shall turn it into parables) that need double backing up... 

a long long obvious issue..

BUt what sort of person does not THINK before sending out a lil' aid parcel... this one all 6tb... great idea..makes the donor feel great... except 18 mths no good to me as just saving 100gb takes an hour plugged in...

and that's not feasable never mind the dozens of hours to do full salvage of old splendid tell-tale,  imagery......

 

you need a fixer on hand a week frantic i didnt realise my shirt entirely giving up

of course this also Segways in...it is EXTRAORDINARY nobody has even written an article about how as the Central europeans decided from 2016ish their future not quite so rosy - so so many AMERICAM evangelical or semi-bongobongo religious organisations bought up almost any old church no longer in use in The MArches (i guess they got 'golden' visas..)  and installed their ultra sexist chauvinistic women degrading religions all over!... 

I do not mean Islam i mean the other Abrahamics..

so many!

And many chats with many all confirm a woman is a second class article, usually not even allowed into the meetings to decide who gets the job redecorating their new bongo bongo spiritual churches..

All so sweetly YAnk...

why USA of course hasn't ever had a woman as MAggie....

who are all incidentally VERY Ayn Rand adjacent which is the exact opposite of their bibles i know well enough....

which say do good works - real ones... down ear first...

nope they all fake that i know as i have many hours on themtoo..

But what galls is i am quite sure enlightenment writers from Kant to whoever else even Dickens managed to explain that charity ALWAYS is a corrupting force as there is always patronage and patronage means mates rates..

or someone always gets excluded... or the giver's ego or especially 'i am saved -  you are not' snotty elitism, gets in the way of his brain....

they used to call that merely smug.

Funny thing is the most present Christian in my life as intellectual equal, couldnt even figure 2103 that telling someone down on their luck or flayed by their random  life... and hardly any work or cash for obviously eythical reasons, could fix their shed roof...

"wow work at last and seemingly good conversation.." a month later he can't even remember his 'offer' which included a walk around the job to be done..

To busy i guess with three million quid church financial affairs rather than even know his own scripture " yet your yea be..." is HOW the countryside used to work...

Theytoo want to live safely aside, there,  away from the madfolk .... they in the main heled create...

Andy, the PAndy..

 and his weasel words

"maybe... i will try and get back in the EU in my lifetime..."

Now 2016 or really 17 one thing i know for sure as i did the actual km - all 5 or more thousand by old bike (every day recorded in full) is that nobody - the so called goody goody 'greens' who in the provinces (majority of CONstituencies - are the same as the pro EU lot i know i lived among them far too long...  whom also happen to be the compulsory 'lets make a dreamcatcher' lot or sell crystals at 5 grand each - many photos of all of these over a decade) ...cycling around askim them face to face - 100s, many hundred if they perhaps may meet to plan the next electoral questioning of the scrofulous peeps (as in 2019) or even in the future...as it takes a LOT of teamwork to say get my articles into even local papers..

( Not ONE EVER EVER FOLLOWED THROUGH EVER.... or even called a few together Nov 2019 " shall we make some signs " - as it happens i was rebuilding an old walled garden of THE tory agent in Powys and she - very old - had a superbly effcient mass signage operation preparation for frankly Boris deserved his bonkers brexit...no EU/greens did ANYthing ever except argue and do nothing...a super chronicle i will even sell 10% of in advance i know i shall get an advance one day!.... i know nobody else has such a perfect record of why Britain deserved to fall down FArrages ugly sinkhole... especially in thge majority of the constituencies - in the provinces, its always the same local 'goody goody green adjacent' character people look to to organise...i knew dozens and not one ever ever did a thing... except clever dick talking of bus numbers of millions... when UKIP had a military campaign to grab every vote ) 

Anyway if...if....poor man, it happens and there is a rematch....

One thing i knew ten years ago is that the rhetoric was disastrous. Money.....

And thus especially the last three years as in 

chat with Belgians the LEAST interesting of 100s

https://www.ralphschism.com/2026/09/to-edit-urgent-and-why-uk-is-already.html

one has to ponder a better 'MESSAGE'.

i.e. as quickest example, 100s of chats with younger European women on walking holidays about books and they WANT to talk..for hours...as equal with an old bloke 40 years older than them.

Never mind the huge ,mental health disparity - all europeans report very few of their inner circle with any of the problems that 20% plus of Brits have and also talk of...

And just things like sex - all French know the dullest topic of all to discuss or write about, you just DO it...

BUt if one is interviewing Euriopeans  - mainly women on walking hols, alone...

And ask " so do your friends have a reasonable normal sex life...?" they give you exactly the answer you hoped for which is of course... we enjoy the fruits of our wisdom and age .. and know what is what..." in a sexy accent

Whereas in britain god only knows what is and when ...

It is trite to say " we need the Europeans for all sorts of education, even if true...." but i know nobody will even attempt to build via books stories realities..a real picture...if there were an Andy PAndy maybe...

And thus merely occupying myself on 'STANDBY' for years ready t 'pivot' if a lost lass may at last need to chat about Stockholm...

I occupied myself with, for her even if halfie, the greatest obviously au naturelle chats on Europe with Europeans...

as a comparison to..here 

where especially the last 5+ years all they - the crystal chem trail brigade..

all they talk of is a non existent great reset

which means of course they dont have to ever ponder taking part....doing anything

As it's already been 'DONE' to them in Bill Gates's porch...

or theyre too busy doing home improvements....

 now however... all critique is prefaced by 99%... i only would point out the rural places utterly died if i knew it didnt have to be so..

as 1% of women/partners whatever do manage to learn how to fix stuff, too...and i have lots of them in my film archives not that old only a few  years ago...

i wish to show...to make the rest realise just how useless they are especially now their supplement and crystal sales operations arent exactly raking it in...

which IS why the ordinary rural places died - nobody to even keep up with the fixing any more..as it does take two to tango...

see next post  for more imagery all linked now. 

Now, pause.... (dignity)

 With the ultimate of indignities, and jargonate insanities,  arriving in my inbox ten days ago - the unimaginable dread....

of them.

Later i shall reveal...

But all i care about is when a man - a so called man, cannot even take in a decade ago the greatest compliment " you recharge your batteries in pairs or groups of those bought at the same time, same potential for recharge.... " and doesn't even recall that ONE GREAT THING....

that's part of the overall important 'it - to reduce reuse etc...

a GREAT lesson - symbolically important. And he doesn't drink or drug... 

even if lost to that sky faerie one..

There is no hope.None zero. Egomania and BPD flooded his flood plain, too...

 that's a bit of weird FAery magyc - exactly 99 mb when this post page only allows 100

dignity 'authenticity' or just integrity, is NO matter 

what

wrong way around not a second to look at or rearrange and likely i have thus far omitted the most Orwellian Kafkan crap ones (thazts say their 'takedown' copy of this whole blog is in fact corrupt..it has errors in it

yesterday at 0440ish

now the above even if INCOMPLETE

is a 30gb download

and budget digitalling means you have a 60gb hard drive never mind it taking two days to download it all....

(assumed) - in place with socket....

however....

on look againing at their gobbledygook, there are ten videos listed that will be deleted for 'maintenance

but it says 17 are in fact to be removed...

no copyright or rudeness issues merely god only knows...

but being as it has taken a week to save this material all 30 gb - ahahhh its never as simple as justa  save.... on the most frayed imaginable shoestring, rechargeable batteris ALWAYS charged whenever a chance (charger an old one takes 6 hrs per  pair of batteries)

i beat you....

as this isnt for me.  It only costs me cash - 20 a year domain times about ten

google drive storage a few quid a month...never mind data at 10 a month

And dignity is merely doing what you know you need to keep keeping on with no matter what...

as its obvious.

Anyway silver lining a few months ago i pondered attempting to back it up.... and it was too hard to get consistent socket..

its SO SO pleasurable to be forced to do what you did need to do....

Even by dint of someone elses bad acts...

There's no sane reason why those clips needed 'maintaining' and deleting...

what has theor server got wonky patches?

As many of my 20 ext hard drives do..

next films in THE GREAT RESET

and i never lose any data....

PURPOSE next

real 'purpose' (now i don't 'hustle', even 'ethically')

In my hundreds of lil' notes still working on ergonomically logisticalating, into a more efficient system

(BUT!!! hahh hahh the YAnks really have surpassed themselves of late - later.... a week of my time stolen of late - for you meanies as you will see in a few hours)

This morning a wonderful woman on radio 4chan Today - all excerpts to be listed soon - over years, her saying all the thousands of quid you have been conned into spending on 'perimenopause' super supplements, are a con

Why should that have anything to do with me?

Because as for a year attempts  have been made to essay, here, into the facts of society: 1 only women have the voice in many matters such as environment, and even can the next gen get a house - not without a mini revolution! in that mad world at least. Men are not allowed to be 'passionate' - it is seen as perimania that will result in maxwells silver hammer...

2. every woman for some years i meet is utterly stuck in the fraud of my body is lacking...  because they have succumbed to this great big ongoing con for several decades - especially as women live a lot longer than men...

and they are so unhappy it's daft...

3. all economics, especially this false 'lefty's nonsense designed to spread fear...

and ALL environmental and social policy and ALL green Party acid spittle, fails to include THE number one best bang for buck

 

 that especially in rural regions there is a pandemic Apocalypse of living alone which is disastrous for many pockets... and the environment (two per logburner at least) and also causes both sides of the equation to die earlier..

But not one of them will ever say this. I guess they fear health and safety coercion lawsuits.... 

Anyway... i only ever hustle when a huge price has been paid up front...

As even a few hours conversation attempting over a whole decade to share and storyboard such matters is not just for the common good, its always for individual paid-up-front good, too...

As will be the various writings to come on how no end of (last year) public information on how a whole class or at least 75% of the 'middle class' were conned by Patrick Holford inc and disciples, into this utterly fatal obsession with their supplements when it means they cant afford to live...or the TIME TO WALK...as the fine lady said gruffly it is all so expensive...

But nobody dare write 'story' on all that.... as The Booker judges, and the wife no doubt of the editor of The Skeptic (we did approach, semi successfully - in a WOMAN's name)  are of course stuck in the same trap...

But the older i get i realise all British culture was self pitying pap

especially her

I would only say such having a month back sat and been serenaded by a fine real singer

Even if i guess she will be stuck in the above trap, too....

Thing is so few dare to even think of how they may be.....

especially there in The source town....

Which means you never even have reliable walking companion, and know full well few actually do that as I have spent a lot of the summer walking, awaiting the gibbers to just text back when they say they will...

One gives up.

But...next... a briefest quickest ever cheat sheet on what IS the 'purpose' of having  bothered to survive...

And i know item 1 is the one that nearly nobody can ever keep as top of the pops.

(it is also writing things up that appear so scrappy when that's what you cared about - some semblance of sane image)  - as, as always, one explores from time to time what IS in the obvious 'common good' even if just attempting to gather stories as above

as i have

diligently for years.

Not for me.....

And no publisher would ever dare publish something real about why so many are ill.....  or need to run to

Ahahh... now so so so unfinished a section, and its too battery draining to find the picture again, but one needed to KNOW: who is the very worst populariser in such awful bimbo storying, of 'the universe' is on your side/ will sort it out/ will send you to the very best therapist... when there are so many who are the very worst...

Mister 'universe' 

with his 'what if' ..my life were different.

Me i wouldnt have one second some alternate as you earn who you become...by persisting.

Now its obvious that the 'trick' is to always send the reader back into making good the only one you had... (so forgettable a useless bimbo Richard and Judy type book i forget the plot and only read it two months back..)

But when one had no idea four years ago that anyone may continually say " the universe" will deliver / manifest / is bigger than any mere person / doesnt like you.... and many more NONuniversal loads of garbage...

no idea that 95% of the middle class especially female Lowlanders runaway from the towns as the Fraud Squad was after them for selling dodgy suplements - i.e. all of them....speak just so...

 And him their god....

on the Desert island at the weekend - one really did need to hear him reveal nothing real, except as usual performative crack up...

that merely resulted in thinking the universe is on his side..

Well if that is so it's a dead end one way, The Road kind of universe... that only ends in one thing - zombies eating each other for dinner....

That's at lunchtime  which won't exist any more, as the lower classes are quicker to get violent and cannibalise with actual menaces and mean it...

and know where the chubby wealthy ones are as they clean theior houses do their shopping blahh di blahh...

(me no middle class Rupert or moron or Haigian disciple, espesh female, could even think just how fortunate one may be, come Md Max times, to be able to whip out a bit of proof:  

 "i won a court case a big one, that rather proved that i was no baddie as i could never have gotten within a hundred miles of lass, from 2004,  if the fine black judge Singh had thought for a moment i was  - as he was prominent as being Wales first black judge..... as you can see in these few papers....  yet immediately he gave her back to me....  howevver i also spent a few months in the slammer which you fine Mad Maxwellian  guys will know all about... and know a bit of the lingo...'podmate' hahh hahh all that.... 'dyer know Richard Giles from Aberyswyth..?.. he was eaten alive as an innocent man as Malkinson as Malkinson.. a beautiful starseed soul.. they destroyed him and his young boy Diesel and girlfriend.... i have never known such a gentle sweet man fitted up as the cops were too lazy to find the real culprit as EVERY single lag in the slammer then, 03, said too....  

" so youre not going to eat me just yet...I'm one of you guys,  or at least tried to help a few....... "

Mad MAx: " here have a beer and d'yer wanna join us at the fireside....   smells good.... human flesh is a sort of version of frogs legs we heard you waffling about in your audio at the weekend..."

Anyway thats not real purpose (even if it is the ultimate silver lining of about three  real purpose in a bit)

 

 And Mad Max of the future, who will be coming - the way they drive in the hills of Dooneshire, theyre already here... and wait til the fuel goes up more, and ...etc

He won't be stupid - and they know what AI is and telly - they love a bit of telly...

I always carry in my small go-bag, my protection.... 

and a file dated 20 years ago isn't going to be an AI scam - a bit of fine talismanic telly

https://www.simonclayton2020.com/p/media-on-cases.html and they -  them Max's know social workers,  in fact all  lanyards are totally Nazi and have been decades....

 

"Purpose"...

 now... my substack waffles are entitled 'Purpose'.

Even if i started them over three years ago,  as with all as a deposit for thoughtful reflections, if one kicks that proverbial bucket. There being quite a few good parables within them. And deliberately titled with obtuse sounding titles. Not as some arsey rant - i never rant, I merely reflect. How did I happen to (to use the latterday Toty word they spout so as to look good)  evolve? when there was no reason at all even to think of fellow human...

But a year meandering the albeit less very-druggy, lands of Dooneshire, one discovers the complete lack of any deeper 'purpose'  in anyone and tghus understood, at last The Marches - thirty wasted years there.

Even if like Mister Kant  seemed to discover, being stuck somewhere as a bit of an observer on the sidelines, that's what is in fact best for you. If you are  going to have the purpose of merely taking part in pondering the latterday human condition, and figuring why on earth it has become so wonky. Which it has. So many of the 'middle class' even on their short breaks  trying out their new walking boots in midsummer, say so.  And the proof is often around their eyes -  a lack of good sustaining sleep. Me with a life that most would consider dangling over the cliff edge with merely a fraying rotten (left out in the weather for years, as they do with all the nylon ropes in Pasty fishing coves - adding to the delightful microplaccy mix as bit by bit they decay and merge with their so so lovely 'environment' , and nobody DARES say a thing), i always sleep  perfectly. The full monty. Which is scientifically well researched to be seven plus hours.

But time and again chatting with all of those who wish to have remedies to their rather frazzly and fearful  headspace,  the actual real purpose of the evolutions, is left out. As if they daren't say what the real purpose is.

And my material even if it is all splurged out into one or other long audio - mixed in with other reflections,  is (seemingly) rather discombobulated merely by not having the several weeks with a  socket necessary to edit it back down and index.  I say 'seemingly' as i assume that there are some who check in fairly regularly and may have caught on to  themes bounced forward with. 

The big, main, 'purpose' though i shall reclarify. And a 'case in point' is exactly now. 

 

   

 

Now...

If the world could see.

They will soon. Or at least you meanies.

I thrive on, despite.

However to rescue a lot of filmed bits  - many terabytes, never mind google come along a few weeks ago and say ...

a euphemism for you have to make a copy of - download,  thirty giggabytes, and then figure how to put them back in which has taken a week...

never mind the week to  fix rather a lot of broken old storage  devices to do it....

to get use of a socket for days on end..

has required days of free labour - MOST happily exchanged....

but it was planned to end a few days ago and always takes three times longer than you know it will...

And what with the pandemic - its hilarious, material one day, of gibbers the last few months...

I cant even pay my monthly storage fee - a long way away.... and...

 https://www.simonclayton2020.com/2026/09/appeal-estis-library-i-must-rescue.html

thing is the silver lining  - there always is one. Three years i needed to just TRY and sort out so many photos and all that just to put here....

all those gloves soon ready... and many more such states of the 'nation' - not mine i am always 100% methodical and organised..

NO matter what.

to go along with the how on earth does a parent manage to lose a child's sock in the wilderness - easily the amount of kids stuff you see.... 

Now, is now an allowed word

 So, almost two decades having in mind one word.

Even if as a very self obsessed one, and long ago forgotten, nevertheless paying homage - and rather lampooning in parallel, the lies and fakery of sadly one who for decades played at being sad.  Her moggy. Begins with M.

A word that maybe can be 'home'  - symbolic, to describe the whole dam thing.

Now.... as I recently attempted to describe in a long 2x mammoth (one mam=  3x Nerdudan hours ) chat - though of course one cannot expect ones interlocutor to take in and mull over the full simple meanings in all in such a long one, being geographically stuck as even if the English don't seem to think this way - a beautiful example 10 days ago of a chat where one rightly critiques the total atomisation and sharp elbowed selfishness where a simple landman cannot ever ever ever rely on ANYones word in respect of jobs stated as ongoing to be DOne - errata all critiques are prefaced by 99% or it should be 97% of them....

 (gibbers / 'illusionists' = liars who promise to -  SMILINGLY - the smile is important! buy that horse and will be back with the gold the next day never to be seen again; or a neighbour who may say "of course i will help you clear that fallen tree over our drive" and then come the day of the joint bigJOB chopping, mysteriously doesn't answer their doorbell - all an ancient version, even if in ancient times far rarer than the nowadays 97% default version, of what  is 'people pleasing' in todays infantile lexicon..

I have only shared that word once.

Anyway.... overwhelm, and the really hard lil' nouveau infantile phrase - 'letting go' I myself have to use in shortcut language as i don't yet know what are better words for it....

zen got stolen by America and the longer i bother living especially this year, of randomish 'catch up' in life with a  couple of once really important yank friends - deeply important in the life os someone  - me, who 'deliberately' to quote their infant Waldenite, has always kept my friend allowance down to just a handful so as then we have the time and energy and 'space' to know them well.... 

The standard Lowlander 'friend' list  - there is that so called technical term which is WRONG - the 'Dunbars number' of 150 is an absurdist ONLY towny thing...

I know my evolutionary biology as i had, and still have ( - saved all these years for Estelle, only.... unless it can't be saved... as the £50/month lease runs out  Thursday - and every wasted second over 10 years i have inside me as it ain't my fault....though they MUST be turned into bad poetry or Turner worthy art...one day)    a large collection.

And humans essentially stopped 'evolving' when agriculture was invented  - the normal evolutionary forces suspended by trade, and if you actually live in stone age conditions i have  - in real rural lands, although a highish tech version, you required to depend properly on just a handful of people.... and all the rest are merely people you recognise on the street going for food shopping  and may smile at, and chat with occasionally, maybe even sell an old bicycle or car, to... but  essentially one is monitoring them mainly for danger  - will they rampage my way come the next food shortage. or heating oil cataclysm (audio a few days ago)

In fact that Dunbar number is merely a  dilettante  thing of bourgeois modernity  - status needy people, preening their feathers and  strutting around like Peacock... or hen. It's not FOR anything real....

And of course became that terrible Fakebook fakery as of nearly 20 years ago of the online 'network'... who one has  absolutely no idea if theyre up all night, only, unable to sleep, and pondering becoming a dead parrot by their own hand or artisan 'maker' machinery at home...

(The whole damn swestershire in three years meandering though for long periods not going very far which is the best walking - a ten km walk back and forth the shops is best for landlope modality and pure Oracle Babe mediative purity... but unlike all them things, it works! .... yes... i have never heard in my whole life of so many Dead Parroting themselves by their own hand - loved ones children... so this is serious! and of course as even centuries ago they whacked into the great books, anyone seeking sybaritine certain pleasure and peace in some new region they run to, often on mummy's L'Oreal shares..or their stolen loot from being a Monsanto exec for some years,  will never ever ever find it....and will hurt internally even more - that's if the glyphosate residue doesnt get them ! or is PAstyshire  the residue of strong glyphosate sprayed all over the Cot Valley and surrounds... even if their local famous eco-warrior he just profits from his name...as eco warrior...never DID anything about that carnage..[ TO BE CONT..i have recordings from 2 years ago  of his tax evading lies and scurrilous deceit - conning you the public he is a goody goody who cares - and thus gets public money as grants to show HOW he has cared........ when  he cares only for one thing: rich fanny, who he can attract to his 'events' if they buy in to his very very inadequate art and become of that elite clique].... )

And ... well almost everyone doesnt sleep well, many only sleep with potions, and most are obsessed with potions to deal with their inability to afford the VERY fancy potions... in short the running away to more 'peaceful' places to restart....doesnt work.

As one knew decades ago....

Me i only relocated here for one reason... and then can't afford to relocate anywhere else, but then milder winters it has to be said one can USE if loving the outdoors one works best IN it....

Anyway... now... 16 years ago i heard someone say "exasperated" in a  rather exasperating setting...

And ever since then  - i know i will outlive her...

Thats what booze does to you apart from making you CARE about someone elses madness designed to damage you - the non drinker is so so so medium term care FREE the longer I non-drink life is even more of a pleasure realising that is one of the root causes of a form of madness - if kept up, where people take everything to heart... and have those 'dark thoughts' as a result of being acclimatised to the grape...

Move away from that climate entirely and you no longer live in a  climate of fear - what the grape thrives on like your crappy algorithms..indeed there's a good example of the Faeries 'helping' that had never occurred to me as a fair allegory until it typed itself unthinkingly out of my fingers in a hurry due little battery...

Anyway a very abbreviated version of what ideally will be put into a  few pages: so..i am a fairly chummy person and can and at times do speak with ANYone... either 'side' of a non divide - chavvy underclass(i am allowed to call them as i am the class under them) , to  junky.... (the majority though they hide it)   to the majority all of whom desperately need to be 'middle class' despite utterly denying they are (the bourgeois cage -  shortcut words) its so laughable someone should turn it into a song - i will one day if no one beats me to it

(wow at last its WORKing  💪😗😝 - celebration i only use one emoji every 6 mths i know how to curb appetites.... - later...)

WHAT DOES 'LETTING GO' MEAN...?

And really one cannot entirely answer that unless one codifies what one needs to let go 'of'.

Now - what shall i call her? Even if i like her full name, its one of my faves...

But as ALL is universal - all is in Brave New World, and Lordly Flies... even if i catch a few temporarily, the great majority being too cowardy custard to continue just great conversation.... and thus nobody unless like him down South they hide their public money addiction behind some chummy fake mask as 'community'....

Merely The Brave... 

I quickly shared with her a not-very-good example of 'it'.... 

 my sexy readers (not YOU - my specs!) - only needed in low light

Next to a found pair just as good but make me look like EVERYTHING i know has ruined your culture... that did work, once.... ( i still often think of that in the dour film Land of The Blind - CHECK any thought of change beyond the pure self, for unintended negative consequences for others...always...as grandiose Messiahmania disorder, catches up with 99%  almost always, especially if they are in The Green Party....

So if i did break the sexies, i never do...as i take care...but if i did i would feel shit inside for some time.... even me, except i have let go so much by being MADE to let go it would only nowadays be 3 minutes, not even five... before i forgot i needed to let go...

Now i have three years of collage, one day soon....from 3 years landlopeing a region - 95% in the rural places, but if one must go through their horrid towns and villages of only runaways then one thing is as sure as ferrits are ferrits, the endless signage DISPLAYING how 'let go' they are.... has failed. I have never known such unhappy, wan, dysfunctional places all over...

And of course 99% have illnesses they tell you about in the first three sentences of any new encounter ( a case study soon - the music man - his mind seemed tip top to me..... despite his moans)  

Anyway DONT LOOK!

I will spoil it now..... but the effort i have had to go through - but HAPPY effort...a new inner 3 or 4 one may TRUST .... 

mutual benefit

Mutual need..

to get a week at a socket, is historic.
And only for you the meanest browes in history...

But letting go means not 'all is nice' or all are nice as they are NOT.... it means going with a kind of flow...

that isn't all 'nice' but is real art...and i know nobody else does it quite so serenely so that nobody even knows my ...

Unchanged, purpose of a decade

That just got better. With nothing; only failure.

So so so many summer notes to share, and I am hundreds of video clips behind....but there's a reason - a 'negative'  - VERY negative most would say..

That is more than a 'silver lining' it will mean that this winter my desk is so cleared its daft....

I wrote at least 3 years ago "complexify to simplify" and at last its shown to be true

However i am irrelevant... 100% nobody nowhere.... THE lucky one. Who had to let go bit by bit and thus has great energy as all worry around our 'needs' just steals it...

All i know is its so boring meeting those who cannot

And cannot even figure basic maths and sums and reality..

Even Klein managed to work it out a decade back, that certainly minnows like this sceptic aisle...are UNsustainable without far more sharing the real version...collaboration....

Etc...

soon..... if i ever do get one to committ 

to just a bit.

There have been at least 5 or 6 fakes 

the three years of late

TO EDIT URGENT and... why UK is already nuts compared to EU - splendid example

Righty ho the meanies couldn't imagine the work that has been underway to keep this show on the road

To begin to bring the interviews - full versions soon

With some Belgians  - randomly, often it's a sought chat, on how UK sure is the really sick one..... 

THIS ONE TO BE EDITED

but the early bird can have the unedited version for  a bit

DISCUSSION STARTS 36 minutes in

audio file in here

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1X-lWhDjwlsVQ3XJbzTBcXdamXYC08MCg/view?usp=sharing 

So, at last...

 The last one.

(how can she say it's hard to read?! Not me, his great one that is: Count Leo's  Resurrection I count among the simple great ones about equality! 

she, the putain, had total autonomy

What they all wanted

 as Leo could be counted

on figuring out way before the rest!

As long as you rip out the last two pages

His best!) 

"may an owl roost in the room where you sleep.."

 Well, I'm merely a copyist.... 

Except never ever revengeist.

But if folk[them 99%]s can't read how on earth can one even figure what trust is....

 now...having earned  one of the rare goody 1%ers  ("dad where do those naughty one percents come from.." still the wisest line in history even moreso than the supermodel's 4 year old " mum what are the 'issues' everyone is always talking about?" causing that last taboo to be bust: chatting up supermodels - poor things nobody dares! after we both wet ourselves a few cafe tables apart, becoming infact mutually bonded buddies over his so wonderful observation, and it turns out that SM worked with younguns and also knew you...have NO hope! you've Affluenzad all of em.... ) 

yesters

Now.... how to dish out vats of spite that even the most hardened spiterly one of you will have their already small one, shrinking into your designer jockstraps..

soon

All i know is that in February 2024 i gibbered a man....a fine man; the man who became in the tough year my most beloved man:

 " blahh blahh... yes i can see now all lawyers are utterly mad, and even Jeremy Jenkins my so called barrister was mad and when for example the finest  rare example of a decent Londoner

who would go into hades and get to know his client's quirks... as a necessary way to do HIS job.... JJ can't even be (2003) bothered despite a celeb case....

And of course was godfather of that English woman....

(was this some revenge on me for not being crucified by her? - the only man who wasn't, by her)

now you will think misery and babe stuff...

NOPE that's the first time i have ever even seen the sexy Frances  - i knew she was a flighty sext type when we would natter on her phone.... but never imagined i may see her aint this tiube wonderful!.... her and I battled alone against the Straw man 2009 through her rag.....

email that eve.... prior publication "simon...i do NOT [ you could FEEL the St Trinnians head girl in her  fizzing with hate, between each keystroke] respond well to blackmail [sic]..."

 THE most beautiful words ever an English woman can email you

BUT, A finest one of them all does exactly what she is told by a superior mind and wins her great accolades by writing in her 'newspaper of record' she's the legal ed of The Times of London... next day exactly what i told errrrr....

But of course STILL ends up liar liar panties a smoulderin'

" thank you that was a successful piece... stirred up a few of their smelly old jocjkstraps....i owe you lunch one day my man"

And never even following up with " when you next in town..?"

Now.. the key number one to the overwhelm and all of mindfulness is to be able to TRUST your own words....

Me to IAn MAckay that early 2004 day " i will defo book you to be my lay legal man for the hearing early next week.... it's 99%.... let me confirm later in the week... just in case some small personal issue [lie - overwhelmed, stuck blowing a fuse, frozen with fear]  causes a delay and i can't take you on......."

One never calls him...and thus the booking he could have sought helping out  some other victim of justice albeit at £100 a day but worth every penny....   he didn't. And thus my INnaction caused him to suffer...

TO BE CONT...with lots of painful stuff that show just how mean my thousands of readers are and what i have to do to not even survive but save my writings..... not for me, for you

when i am on the ultimate skinned teeth edge, vomiting the teeth residue over the cliff edge every morn  to try and attract a passing albatross to bump it on its head so as to have something to eat

but i wouldnt have one second any different, ever, thanks...

'trust'; though i fact the only words are i adore your spite...

 And am about to duel-back spiting even spiteyer...

(having especially discovered that 99% really cannot read, ever ...)

So, where does one start? at the end. Soon.

Especially on the last JOB. Unless.....

TO DO...

 Now we know just how moaney he is.....

So, even if everything espesh when one is METH odical....

 takes three times longer than the plan

 A, B, or by their sea

ten times longer as it corrodes their brains

into a compressor stall

Hidden.

at last....

As i showed one example of  ' IT  ' 

the other day.

We are off..... but talk about timely. I had no idea just how moaney bimbo their best  selling writer was ..

And how useless his ferapy: 

If you start heavy boozing again when with young child regardless of  the 2020 hysteria,  gorgeous slowdown...

You sure ain't fixed 

Why if course every other page is littered with some ' universe' they still think will fix em...