"art"

 ... that's what it was!

:-)

And it is time to return to decent English - all those apostrophes, and semi colons need sticking in...soon... because i do have a life;  even if riffing upon it nowadays simply is my favoured mode, because so so sohhhhhhh many little worthy projects, the last three years especially, one may as well be speaking to a brick wall. Especially in respect of the supposedly most attentive maybe-collaborator, from Surrey... What a case study she is..

Anyway, yessss.. art. I remember what i actually planned to say when i turned my camera on back up on the hill: "art: i really can...

In fact 13 years ago i began to doodle... a lot..

Grief - the real version, after a while - nope, sorry minimum 3+ years!  a new depth of vision can come along - colours seem even richer.... blah di blah... but, also the real version of 'yes everything can be art..' you 'get' at last.

And i have ten years of dancing .. it is dancing more than anything else, among small visual projects, dotted about me - some for years, attempting to join dots, and present ideas  - real, not obscure show off bullshit, ones...in new ways... that aren't show off bullshit obscure, to make the artist look good...yawn...

And i think some of it is ok, or even good,  my only problem 

... and i 'know' surrealism, avant garde, nihilism and up-yer-bum art ..but am not a cynic.... and whist agreeing with Fred here - art really should have a purpose... 

i don't think it is 'over' .. unless the present, maybe even 40 year ongoing paradigm of complete acedia throughout society... continues; and as scientifically/economically it cannot..(not jumping in even if life threatening and helping a neighbour's kid being alienated and rather expecting the government to pick up the no joke several million quid costs... all that psychobodily 'illness'...in a bankrupt country, because it has been doing the job as unaffordable subcontractor, to .. 'the village'  - to raise a child; for decades... ..never mind clean up the old ones' bodily fluids .... even a 3 year old can work out the 'math' don't work out)... i wonder if art hasn't really got going yet...

but i find 'artist'..dull, ... or rather my extremely extensive  chronicles to date, prove beyond all doubt - especially in the several post referendum years... artists are on autopilot as humans, in fact are papier mache models of humans.... and their vocalisations are as real as shouting at martians from the moon, where i believe sound baths may not quite 'work' at £250 a weekend... (prove they work here and i won't one day publish those hundreds of artistic pictures taken at the dodgy bathing spot where  people on the chain gang  - that thing you get instead of a fine now - are actually used by mister most-smug-of all  organic grower and £250 a weekend in a  very very mouldy yurt.... to chop logs for his commercial enterprise.... when that is so against the law it is daft... but then every 'healer' and messiah ands Miss-iah i have ever met - hundreds....they somehow seem to think that  law doesn't apply to them...

But how do i make art of all that? it should be.. the video of the wood being chopped... but of course it is only when the reason for the presentation is woven in - it will have to be words....does it hit you as hard as it should: that's the sweet guy in just the right pretend hippy garb (he is from the Home Counties as they all are) is ... well...not as he sells himself. At ...all...

what is the saying?: art should comfort the disturb, and disturb the comfortable... 

i remember that one, not often so good on quotes..

mainly cos fatso sent it to me... my collaborator.

I am not sure about it;  part 2 yes, but i don't believe 'comfort' truly helps the disturbed. If we care about the disturbed rather than share platitudes as rote thought self regarding nonsense, ,i am  not sure at all ...in fact i know it is something else that really helps..often....And have a lot of REAL experience in that field.   And a hell of a lot of REAL literature  - books.. novels by the wise (and most enlightened - Mary Ann Evans' 'fool' in Silas gets real life...not platitudes.. , the true seers from past times...seem to  somewhat agree... 

(but him - my last few days 'project' and he is dangerous..i thought for months....him - he truly is genius, his timing and way as good as Peter Cooke.. Hancock....... except he cannot 'believe' it - bodily, despite actually saying it in our filmed interview last week..as the local 'powers' .. will not support me...  it does not suit them for anyone to know that all along he really had  a talent that is a real one...almost from 'god'....  they rather he hang around for their scraps of alms... it is as if we are back in - i doubt it was like this - so insidiously inhuman,  even in 1400  pre sky-fairy-no-more times... 

And many many photos to start to display soon.... (even if my literary hero did rant so gorgeously at the  proliferation of the little machine which stopped us using the greatest image maker of them all - the minds eye...which does need practice... good job i have another use for mine...in fine fettle thank you..despite becoming rather a photographer... good excuse: they're so fucking up nature even here.

 (because the greens are too wanker and scared of health and safety to recommend: want small farms? must get down and dirty...woman and man, or guess what sterile industrial agriculture manned by immo young men slaves takes over..ohh guess what it did..my my i have a fabulous audio / visual / filmic record of years of that cant and vanity from 'greens'...... but i want it to be ART.. fun even.. beautiful...to replace the natural beauty they only were complicit in destroying...but i am just not quite set up as full creating person - and even bloody shotcut video editor takes LOADS of processer power at full whack..drains the battery in minutes...so i will practice the art of patience: maybe one day) ..someone better keep a propper record...

Talking of which, don't even start viewing or making sens eof this, yet, as one cannot... as there have been quite a few rather special days the last six months, i have started to riff upon, but became waylaid...or in fact had unexpected philosophical fun... and i haven;t got back to finish 'posts... i must, will...soon, until which time 'narratives' to use that horrid cool word, are not yet complete... 

(ooh yes i have a superb memory but writing in four - yes four, different venues.. this is my one i care about, and soon will fold into entirely, alone, just this... but i cannot remember all... Maverick does get all my heart, too, into communication; because i care  - i am not sure why....  he got a riff - mainly as despite being a typical hides from being 'intellectual' brit, he is ... but deliberately send me pictures of football matches to intimidate me..as i would never go to one, in fact never have even watched a football game n tv..or played a computer game, and  he doe sit blessim' as i send him the funniest ever anti-bullneck rants... 

But... one the other day was serious... very... 

There has all y life been a rule...lore..of the land...

A man alone on a hill, or at a river.. is there because he wants to be alone... sort of anyway.... and the unwritten rule was that ANY man walking by  never met the eyes.. never.... one respected the others solitude, or privacy or whatever..

"Mav..your class.... [ he isnt really but we pretend].. the more Lycra or sporting attire especially football attire, the quotient is MOST precise according to attire... now..post their silly years  20/21.. the rural lore men do NOT meet eye to eye unless a clear invitation.... but nope...all above 1% of JDsports quotient... they now STARE... it really is quite horrible and you know me i am bulletproof... some new yes 'underclass' stare - it is now compulsory, especially if one is with some woman unlucky enough to be with them....god they gawp for hundreds of yards.... it is like something out of Dante.... . not only gormless as if they never had any gorm all along... it is very worrying... "

of course no one will notice or dare mention this centuries long  tradition... now smashed to bits by... yes it is self pity - some weird lost neuroses, near mental illness....  and i never wear anything different - simple plain shirt, vest if warm, shorts if warm or jeans... and pumps... and a medium sized backpack... just same old rambling as always for decades.... but i dont look sorry for myself... that is what 'nature' does.. puts everything else into full simple perspective..

good job i am Orwellian-observant, and curious, still......and...

to be cont