Friday 22 December 2023

christianity footnote

 Even if ... hmmm... my own few years in the ' abyss' 2010 11... 12

and " processing" .. .. which is really about letting go kindof ' believing' in something ....god only knows what.... 

Believing ... or rather embodying ..." something will turn up"  in a zennish way  when it rarely does... but other things you werent looking for and maybe benefited from... do

I am grateful for experiencing some weeks  off and on...of not enough to eat.

The biggie is you get too weak to think.... your mental cappacity just slows down... and thats a double bind. knowing you need your wits about you to survive but then your wits arent available once youve been quitr undernourished a few days.... thats scary..ish... good tjing being your wits dont really recognise being scared.

 Fascinating ... its good to experience almost everything,  once...

But a few years later exploring the world of the church and their  free meals for the homeless... in a kind of Orwell living among the tramps mode,  to understand

 ( we werent homeless, nor were we hungry,  but  just spending time,  as helpmeets...with someone else who needed to be in churchy places.... her journey)

It was that subtle emotional blackmail at those free meals.. !   there is no free lunch. Even if almost all 'services' to the hungry  are delivered through churchy locations, so often there is a subtle "we got you in our talons, you need to listen to our message.. a bit"...  without of course suggesting their billions in property holdings isnt maybe part of the...problem...

or that in a land with massively increased differences top 10% and bottom 10%  to almost greatest unegalitarian levels of the modern era ...  maybe they should get a bit 'political' 

' charity' .. we knew 200 years ago... George Elliot she described quite adequately.... is often a bit warped..  has a price, is just as liable to be subtly corrupted

As the christian church certainly does 

( not doing ANY  simple ' work' to assist people with practical matters such as understanding possible legal rights to protect their tennancy).

Funny really,  who would have thought todays news

 " last year there were 800 thousand hospital admissions for...malnutrition"  

who would have thought.. i would like to hear that astonishing statistic  compared with the overall net property worth of all the loadsa denominations of churches in this land... that we saw massively expand throughout The Marches from early 10s

 including  overtest  sexist pig ones, requiring their women to go shopping dressed like dolls from fairy tales... which invaded The Marches, like the Mennonites... loads of them after brexit