Monday 4 March 2024

" I don't Be ..leave... in this

 .. thing called institution" 

Though i have extremely accurate diaries of the few words that impress me...over decades.. i forget her exact sentence, but  " institutions ruin  art...  my art calling... were only talking shops" is about the Be all and end

of her fine words a year ago encountered..


early yesteraft ... after a perfect thoughtful morning.

Later, wandering


" hmmm will i, wont i...?  well its cheap....  and they have a socket... and its a cold wind from the North West....  and who knows maybe one half sane mind may be around a bookish afternoon...

may Be..

lets see

but i dont do ever... never have... 'institutions', or clubs..

and would get ill at a 

' workshop'  even if she were leading the "meditative' walk....

And anyway workshopping indoors when early spring sunderaft every photon brings one back to real life ....


is death..."

( thoughtbubble, " ok ... i hate the idea of 'ok so introduce tjineself and what does  thou want  to workshop in our little fictiom group..? ' ...ok bingo i know.... i like a  stream of comscious diary format,and fuck off, 2010 a BAFTA nom mother  of two, and senior film directoress, professor of . ... told me she felt my poetical energy in writing i did then.. slam splurge.... it just kindof worked.... but heres the thing, all i want ... in fact i value only one writer her and her" bird" book, film script...16 pages [ if my memory serves,i live on an endless happy tightrope of no spare energy to look back up.... so cant recall everything word perfect]... a fictionalised period... menses included...i think thats what the   blooded dress scene was about...  of a snapshot of real life....  

"  i could probably do some fiction from scratch, just sit down let go let the muses type something absolutely fresh for me. ....its happenedcin my head many a time in the past.... but the bugger is....  Edith Wharton to HE Bates,  their magnificent wry lifelike tales.. we learn from.... i did.... i bet they did it.... Noonan we know fictionalised real life in gorgeous society changing Ragged Trousered. .. i got so many real life events in 20 years of chronicles as good as Noonan... as poignant as Wharton's Ethan.... i just gotta change the names and camouflage the odd bit as its so dull arguing with folk nothing  better  to do with themselves than to read ones drivel, as to whether or not its them.... and tbe 99% illiterate who dont understand its not offensive to just poetically pontificate on events..  actual ones, recorded

anyway foibles tend to Be universal....

so me i just want tips: .. guidance as too lazy to figure myself,  quickest way to camouflage... real life

prior November 2022... 

ok theres one encounter last 12 mths that really needs a small novella of her own,  as to THE true problem..of our age .... the ultimate Maggotmunchin Merm moment..  pretends shes a goodest burgher ( later word,  that is refferred to... Slavenka bought forth so wonderfully too) and saviour of the yoof....

one meeting,  her and i last autumn.... should be an Orwell Animal Farm all of its own.... 

otherwise......  all from pre schism time... when i met a great writer

 ok thats good if i Just say that... thatll get em to shut the fuck up assuming and gossiping... "

There is no better non fiction, that the ' problem',i had entirely firgot who she was, so forgettable beyond her ultra 3rd sector, acedia.... hostesses

the workshop

And even bars entry at the MOST grant funded destination by far just a month earlier my newfound superpower babes, the honest. .. the "old grunt" to quote herself, and farmers daughter lass.... had indeed informed " fucking holier than thou old  incomer bags... hajh hahhh...we love your 'Waitrose bags' im gonna use that its perfect.... they get shedloads of grants and then  their big shiny Mermaid supershed,  wasnt used for years...especially by ordinary local folk...."

.. no one knows a thing about


except of late " her hair is still red"  because those  whom are ' opressed' though she alone knows whom self opresses ...her  town, and her and i alone are free... 

have true solidarity

( 100% her 9 year old getting a large van of all my kids stuff, so catefully stored.... books clothes everything.... she doesnt know yet...  i know she will gratefully receive even if she doesnt, need wuth her " 7 jobs" ...and i wouldnt mind if she sells it all... as long ss dhe dont dump it at that con sin-stitution called )

Im very private in some places...

But the truest beauty in non fiction,  you could not make up is....

to Be cont.