this little notelet may be ....
shared, quite directly with the very occasional truth-speaker, i encounter.
This technique, for efficiency....god the time wasters i have had in my life... a decade! (as genuine environmental worker etc) so it is only about never wasting a second more, ever... on fickleness (the kind word for...)
Though online 'encounters' never seem to work.... make real friendship and trust.....so, last time ever. Forget online exists. Except for the material over the rest of life I shall myself stick up.
Been there, done it, got the t-shirt, which says, no depth, as one dimensional as the piece of cloth this slogan is written upon.
My own material always has many fathoms of deep, life... below.... nothing is off the cuff. Everything has been lived... in all sorts of ways.
And some of that 'living' things i know full well is unique, and some certainly valuable - i mean dosh, now...
All in several stores, carefully shepherded, maybe for some successor...
The GREAT book - or one of a handful, Ragged Trousered, was published by his daughter some years after he died, penniless and unknown... 30 or so years later his book was said to have swung elections that brought more egalitarian politicians to power...and he never had even a dream of that! (because unions started to hand out free copies to everyone joining up.... and it is a superb book - alive, scary, funny, worrying, tragic, brave... just like REAL life..)
I got stuff as good.... from real life... but then as no one can read any more, i do not expect even 5 video clicks ..(hahh hahh - i mean REAL "hahhh hahhh.." i have known great sorrow, at great length, so i also know the value of real hahhh hahhh..)
But i do know one thing, my material has many millions of clicks in it...if i wanted.
And there is even something so good - 'written' ( you have no idea!) in collaboration with my one valued friend Mister brownman."mongrel" to quote him...... where he parodies every wannabe goody goody ever...so so intelligently; as he knows that approach does not WORK. It did nothing to bolster his soul... his soul doesn't need bolstering by radio 4 or some other self publicist, it simply needs showing as it is - far stronger and funnier than any other human i have ever met... and he lead me there, too...
That if the 100+ hours of work to put it all up.... if i had the time to do that, with plug, i know we would be headlining at Edinburgh.... once they realised what true pure beautiful art, is.... not quite to their liking, because it is real, and shows truest 'love'.. between two. No matter what the rudest words extant, may show on the surface... (he isnt invited here - what him and i still have is pure..of its place... not here.. but one day as him and i both know should be somewhere - you could make a million from, agenting it....and i do not exagerate...)
But there is one lonely reality.... no flippin woman has REAL backbone... real 'grit'. I have encountered four the last nine months since my 'end of era' began, whom stated in one way or other extreme scepticiism about this society, people, military industrial complex, of a land... they impressed me!
BUt not one ever followed through.... ever...even when given great sincere compliment..i do not do charm....
Oh well... follow through a bit....and you get to be inheritor....
Afer of course somehow proving that it - the chronicle, will be protected for posterity... even if all people do sit and shit water out of their posterior, as good as....
There is i know some real value....
Because i have been 'inside' a range of goody goodie operations not many get in to...
and all, tragically, were i am afraid a waste of my time... except i also knew, if my sincere and quite standard efforts to lead, empower others, etc.. were dud corn being broadcast... or at least onto utterly impenetrable ground...
...well at least do a duel purpose, chronicle every step...VERY accurately..
So it can one day become a Rick Mayall kind of truth comedy....
And proper books, in time, too... and several real broadcasts (the grown up word for audio sharing..)
That said, nuance truly is all, so finding someone who can spell just that word, seems rather impossible.... your phones fried all your brains...
As a few know, i am the real deal.... one doesnt get a full page in The Torygraph...(they do check you out!) ..and wonderful centre spread in The Mail...
even WITH longer hair...
unless one is bulletproof..and have a very helpful (to society) take on things... then, but to my huge surprise especially the last seven years... myself i got better and better...deeper deeper wiser wiser....
And it is worth sharing, properly.... and even helping truly empower one or other...it is not 'mansplaining' - all my material - the roots...has been more or less known of ..always...
And that includes by plenty of once sane and genuinely strong, women too...
In fact the real life 'real life' is far worse, and i know Cormack's The Road... even if as yet no actual flesh munching.
Because in real life, over the years I have my 'careful' people.... those who have kids, for example, and one living with her fine young 10 year old...
four years at times, walking aside in the hills - most carefully because in her isolated high up valley, i know her neighbour... an old sort of employer, is a dangerous lost alcoholic behind the smiles...
And thus nothing ever said to E*** is contentious...(reality - i.e. local truth talk on the environment and the like) just in case.....
So ... now and again, to my few sort of human contacts i may send out something useful, gently real... something of sincere fellowship, via the digitals, to someone i wouldnt fancy if her mountaintop iced over... but i like her young man she happily shared with me....
And had i a gun to my head, forced to predict one of half a doze communicants, last week.... may have Whatsap blocked me. Dear smiley so so 'community' 'van' 'vegan' 'grow your own' 'HOME EDDER' - i am expert on the law, FOR her tribe... would be unimaginable as the only one whom, may...
Had..
...... i now see.
There is no way any person - anyone, because i am good at figuring those who don't act....anyone, now, in this society can ever be predicted... which is in fact worse than that Road... (the ordinary peeps end up munching each other...no government or 'conspiracy' involved....... we may as well...)
