Friday 18 August 2023

now, all i know



Even if three extraordinary years too late...

April May 2020....

cycling around the extraordinarily sublime perfect flowerfilled lanes of W Herefordshire...

20 or 30 km a day... being careful not to ceoss the 'welsh' ' border' unless one wished another passive stalking of "STASI" Grace.... taking ny flask and butties so as to be sat outside the closed for months 'library' of Presteigne..... 'authorised' shopping.... one item at a time wvery day or so just so i may reencounter tbe glorious 'opressor' [ audios!]

i would be zooming along tbe quieters ones... down to 3 cars a day in the glorious slowdown....

never fitter. never better no-hands balance, as i meandering along on the old rusty sit-up-and-beg

singing out loud...

in the ikd whicker handlebar basket tge ( banking) phone ringing .... filming it...ringing with personal phone...

filming it:

" you gotta be kiddin'...never mind no ones got any money left ....whooo whoop paradise.... join  the queue...hmmm such real bliss these days...if only i could figure a way to get paid just to cycle round lanes...wander hills....NOT cimpkete any health and opposite-of  'safety ' top up courses ever...never again do i take part in their lard arse laden society..... but how to get paid to remain in this exact state now for the rest of life...??!!"

now..... whilst too much bas happened in the intervebing three years...whilst being nothing.

The magnificent "insights" into even her... though the story gatgering and telling phase ended last November...

every earlier knsight true, tested, regrettably rit large. ..

she only proved, poor kamb. ..

she gave me the final push.. being so fake-splurge herself  . .. so many photos of her  favoulous face....


the real thing, all of it...

and as i remain offixialky 'self employed' even if co ned by 'employers' ecery single one considers gerself the divine mothership of Theresa and Joan of Arc   .... and theyre all recirded due likelihood they werent what their smiles demanded they were   

i need to write or talk  myself a real arc.....

out if here

except i wouldnt mind it is it worked ..

becausecmy gead every day remains on that bicycle...three years ago  .  and no one can knock me off...hab anything in the spokes..

cos i beat  hero, Montaigne  on How To Live  .

And not yet making any living from it has been the key to how to live even more perfectly at ease and centred no matter what

abd she 'cost' me all my cash... but every half penny.. the best incestment ever in living longer...cos every trepidatious tippy toeing along the cliff edge of... her world this world and starvation... my my it remibds one of ALL that matters.

i mean the 20 year road trip odyssey  .

time to now write some more properly

THEY wanted some of it. .... they cant fool me... they actually

Shantaram withOUT lies ...and sucking up to junk users to maje him look good.  ...and omitting how many will have died due his inability to tell anyone the true cost of his junk...he pimped

the greatest cost if all, all junk and junk uk ' health'..or kistening to junk meditation tapes of sam harris ... all obsession...all, without fail.... destroys creative real new  free thought   

i am the fool thinking 3 years ago ANYone would be open to it....

but one decade .. they may remember me the... well thats for their minds eye.. and maybe even written words one day 

and they can be " sleeping on him..what a crazed weirdo.." 

as i opened to them "wow.. you saying'  why share? she knows who she is'.... " 

the truly wisest thing maybe ever i heard    

but i may be a weirdo.... but never a cynic. in books and film, even song .. people shared things with me....real fuckery...tough stuff.... why Dith Orahn was better than me...Love of a Son .. ending....i know i only survived myself as a kost atomised younger man

because of them trying to educate me... via their words...

and it did work.

and my metaphysical construct is thats the ONLY reason the fairiepixies allow  you to fall for shaman godfesses even my age  tge nmangeks whippin your extremeky pert arse every step of the wanderings   

so the elders ( all over 50s ... been there done that tge poor lost  47 year old ...14 years ago. brainwashed by Dylan and his " forver young"... bs... purpose is also to pass on the goodish stuff..if you can...

if the baddish stuff like  Chopra or Tolle, or any green woman politician including their pet once-men, casteratti  .. .  hasnt drowned you... or made you inhuman

..... i can only collaborate with soneone.... knows this

so i 


 being solo voice is not synergetic infact forever dead ...

even if ...they...showed my why to live ...on, a bit longer at least