Well remember the lesson, as usual the body .. three months of partly decreed downtime.
Mojo
minus ten percent to thirty st times.
We never know what we need
until it has given its gift
Of mojo 100 but more
Stopped.
All the past
place
causes
identity even
paused into
the end
endings take time.
If a new beginning is to be built on just the right balance and dance.
Anyway thats all very well but ' simple' is about having the tital poise and grace and space to notice
and then remember
And not TRY to understand why .
Wonky laptop charger
( i am most organised person on planet ...never crisis..no matter what pressure.. knowing a year even on the road .. i bought two before i set off... even if just up the road into the hills two years ago.... but did they ever work?!... of course not the worldwide fraud... let go, dont bother complaining....)
even if the crumbled tip rebuilt at poopoo creek in July
" miracle, success! .. thought i was finished..."
not quite
Weird magic maybe...
damn thing wont orange-light..
upright ( on its edge)
flat on desk while writing bad posts
The 'connection' will not prevail...anywhere!
Exceot i noticed
just one place- maybe it is some weirdest chance of physics .. leading to some balance or pressure on the base
in exactly the tight place
it always charges just
here
no not 'here' geographically... i am not of 'here ' in any way
I am pnly self contained
need no 'here'
Except for one reason, having at last found....
A place
Next place on the migrations around
dancing around the region, not too far from avenue 6 juin
this morning i awoke and remembered the mental place
arrived at this time last year
even if i am the lucky one, 2017 mouldybug near finished me and i ' met my maker' many a cold morning several years.. at my dawn fireplace embers.
total and complete acceptence of
2020 what sn absurd phoenix time from day one
( i even told the 'beutiful people' Russian yesterday " for gods sake no never lose that mother tongue.... i read Tolstoy Resurrection April 2020 at a river... not weeping Paulo ...only smiling... and was told a few months later by a rare person a cultured man wandering around that lovely bridge, he had read it in the mother tongue and it is a far richer poetical experience... as Leo intended")
Anyway good for me
But once again, a year ago.. despite three glorious years every moment new life, so many new people but never one ... the right one .
talk about the definition of wanting to have every dawn forever, life such fun...
And then ...a year ago a conversation began like i had never had in life...
But... coinciding with two weeks truly at death trap city
December last minus ten fir days and i had a dose of the plague ... ) i need no 'test' i know a diferent bug when it does me... corvid gets me in the legs they go wobbly..
so as if mad i start to wander even higher up the hills... sweat it out or rather boost the natural systems... maybe they will
In short though it is having a kind of home as last years hills had become
One does i guess need some continuity
to think
Even if a year ago almodt to the day i could only think of one place i wanted to Be...
nevertheless also every day for several months .. a total acceptance that even if i feel like paradise if sorts ...for three years... alone but new communities of sorts .. but a final paradise now i know exactly what it is.
Only one person knows tve word 'hiraeth'. .
but for days between calls or phases, of hot then cold....
also i had to live every evening
" i accept totally death... i may not awake tomorrow...so be it.. every day now a miraculous gift, but i dont need them.... i accept my pkace in the
great timeline
totally"
and i know ... lived, it arose within body mind married in one as always ..that to live you have to accept death totally
almost live it
that came back before dawn today..
as if by magic
