Now, I have to be careful, especially as my tales are only
of the past. And just a little ‘present’ ultra vagabonding – even if one must
appear an uber super techie connected zeitgeist guy…. Don’t want to be thought of
as tramp or junky (my my we had one yesterday..)
Especially as I am the most clean living person ever (one
smallest fault – always outside..MUST stop now… eras ended)
So, even here – my my talk about the perfect ‘look’ even if I knew they would be here – I heard Front
Row 6 weeks ago and the local writer lady spoke of ‘theme park’ (must link it
it’s important – it is in my extremely organised build-the-thesis list… and
there is a lie in there as I only deal in
fact – except for the mind/body which is a glorious poem its so mystical
and..(to be cont)
So yes…
Along comes
Mrs Natural Store bag – so perfectly not-new just worn
enough…. With purple yoga mat half protruding
But it is the look – of pity / pain… earnestness… pity for
the ‘world’ …well for the last 7 years but especially from May 2020 when they
all discovered Facebook-zoom… my my the yoga teacher brigade…
…showed their true colours: it hadn’t worked for them..all
that “meditation” and “resilience” and other utter self obsessive smarty-pants
(they will KILL for the most expensive smartest yoga ones I am sure..its the ‘I
am not like the masses’ look that kills… especially when they pretend to be
environmentalist but cannot even bear to stand on the same streetcorner as the ‘masses’
whom they must ‘reach out [ that one almost drives me to drive off the cliff –
the famous one] ‘ to… they are of course already ‘perfect’ - which as a matter of FACT is not so as I have
so many photos ogf mindfulness Queens who extort huge fees and extort even
higher price of never allowing debate… onj why the fuck their tools are so
badly maintained, left out in the rain all winter… and they haven’t even
discovered the truest mindful activity of all of sorting out ones potting shed
(they can afford their rip of fees being so fraudulently high…as a kite they
will get too but pretend never…)
I am serious… the photos
I have – but they need to be artistic. Never mean – just pity in a poignant
pic.. that they read the wrong 500 quid online mindfulness claptrap…Soon…
Mine is FREE
So yes… H is for Hawk
Maybe and his awful Nature Cure.. I bored myself to death
with both. The Maybe has a few grains of
use, the rest should be chucked into the muddy creek… as a pity memoir that in
fact helps no one… especially as he never mentions the root cause – lots of
time in the city .. trying to be noticed. I bet he even wears sunglasses (my
perfect woman would only scoff at as scientifically proven to add to cancer
risks.. the eyes being rather more than the ‘windows of the soul’..
I have probably spent five times more of my life in ‘nature’
as those two put together – ten if we include the 20 years in the skies –
meandering between clouds and High montains as a bushiswh private aviation
person (no one else has EVER given their commercial license – qualified big
jobs too, when child born..”not compatible with her future, never mind also a
diversion and excuse not to be around and do the only privileged job there ever
has been – raise one of us wonky crits….
You cannot get more in awe of ‘nature’ than that
Wrong, nature does not ‘cure’ anything… though it may allow
us in time (if we forget the truly crass inane English language version) to
really appreciate The Sublime…
( defn: natural ‘forces’ ALWAYS ineffable, for pretentious
scholarly types who say words like the sublime in this context… the Polish
version imputes loftiness and goodness, even honour – I would love some other
language versions too..maybe one day)
And that is as pretentious as I get…
Especially when I know – god almighty H Hawk is so awful as
it gets..… I am quite sure 99% of all
women ever – including pre Victorian back to bleedin stone age…
Knew how to tame a ‘bird’
..and sometimes use them for mutual benefit
(oh my what a
sentence hahh hahh my ultra flow
has come back – from some years ago… - even if the real hidden meaning in that
is probably illegal in uk…,.)
The ‘formula’ – I pity the woman Helen Macdonald, only…. in
that she was pimped with such a dreary formula, that is absolutely incorrect in
any event. Simply to recycle4 Maybe’s so so useless formula as he sold a few shed
loads of that one.
Yes As maybe..maybe.. they pick up our vibes..i have spent a
LOT of time with the beasts and still don’t know their reality in conjunction
with ours, and anyone says they do is a
fraud… usually at 300 a day…
Especially as her ‘grief’ was for a dad dead quite naturally
– when he was ‘due’ …. And if you have to moan and ruin a perfectly innocent
hawk’s day by putting your dreadful self –pity onto it, if you ask me that’s a
wildlife crime…
Never mind what an accolade to have to die with..or of.. “I was
once famous for a not very good book about my self pity when a dad died more or
less on schedule..” I wouldn’t like to
be her on her death bed… (she of course is not alone – 99.9% of UK literature /
ordinary fiction / and the other bullshit [ excepting one 16 page film thingummy,
and Rusbridger’s daughter where she attacks dad in print THREE times…what a
lass!!!!] is inane self pitying rubbish – worse than rubbish as it HELPS NO ONE….
Kushner, she helped me – Mars Room – I learned from her magnificent book that
has no pity in it…and talk about sexist piggery wordwide…no bloke could have
included tracts of …(“surely not.. they are beautiful these italicised parts
but….surely not… he was a nasty mass mu8rderer I wouldn’t even wish D Trump an
itchy pot… surely not” [ don’t look: yes I checked later she even reprints the Unabomber’s
manifesto.. even if just the nice bits..he died today .. oh well.. gave eco a
bad name so..] NO bloke would have been allowed to do that and even get a
Booker nomination – she was sexist piggery denied - best book this C… pathetic snowflakes
blocked – yes a dick chopped off no anaesthetic. And far more beautifully bleak
bits… but I am the OPPOSITE of her ending..i believe in happy ones.. and..(to
be cont)
Furthermore (it is I am afraid part of the ‘schism’ – this terrible
animal obsession [neurotic self pity – something other to ‘control’ – I spent
half the winter observing..i never want a dog after what I have seen! And discussed
with the few partly sane people left… very few…
fixing humans is far
more important a job…
Is doable as the instruction manual was rit many moons ago
Things like ‘it takes a village to raise a child’ … which
takes the hard work of getting on, honestly with said nippers’ parent..no
matter what.
No one i know can do – and it was part time my ‘business’
for a decade…
Anyway i now CARE about writing this... it is like a dream. It just all 'fits' in some weird way... i even have a perfect little 'office' when its not... raining (we need some my my if that upper (clean water) part of the river dries up I am fuckerated.. even if its the best bathing river by far yet found..its the 'angles' - i can happily strip off and wallow to hearts content and no residences at all can see me..even just down river... it is almost as if everything was perfectly set up...waiting
Even the angles of parking - an open door perfect windbreak...
One little problem but that is already part of me - inside... hardly a slightest breeze of signal blowing my way but...so what i need to get back to reading a few books. It has been too long...
And one thing i know i shall never be,,, i may like some wild music at times especially that spanish lady and her lovely ranty "coracao" song...whatever the correct way of writing it is - this is ultra speed typing half an hour only of battery./...and i have better things to do..
cynicism never allowed... none ever
i am lucky i found several 'keys' to life (NOT an "amalgamation" of anyone elses work - all is 100% totally my own sick weird mind...and REAL ferkin badjobs... REAL ones..
BUT YOU WILL NEVER FIND ME PIMPING THE PITY..
I HAVE NONE - FOR MYSWELF..MAYBE FOR A N OTHER I DON'T KNOW...
that was accidental cap lock no time change to lowcase..
In the audio this morning is true self immolation on my reader's harpoon.
But a bit later (if i upload - meaNS WALK TO A HILL ...I HAD ENOUGH OF DRIVING FOR A LIFETIME AND THE DRIVING I REALISED 7 YEARS AGO... IT IS impossible TO BE ZEN, MINDFUL, UTTERLY GRIOUNDED AND IN TUNE WITH THE BODY OR HUMANITY, IF ONE IS EVEN IN A CAR OCCASIONALLY... oops did it again..
that time ..well it should be in caps... as i keep forgetting it as part of my NO-pity memoir which will get fruity....soon....
and really IS almost the nub as i know full well i sort of found a better core - energy no matter what bs from others...simply by plenty of forward motion - ideally in hilly ground...by my own legs, such that it may even get one out of breath... that simply IS the only'physical' 'deal' i know... and have tried many... nothing else - hiking or old bike (so its more work) .. and sometimes 'desperate' - so poor one must get to the mark down shelf at nazi Coop at the appointed time or nothing to eat...and its raining ... posh SUVs as well..who nowadays never have the manners to evebn slow down..
despertae
"i will NOT get into town [3 hilly miles away]and back ALIVE..oh woe is me " but when you do... to be cont
soon uploading a short film - the ultimate boat spike rammed straight up where it hurts..i hadnt realised i need to do.
