Wednesday 28 February 2024

' boxes'

 An inadequate way of describing what even I - great memory, loads walking away from nervy townies and  ( do folk even remember, never mind tell immos,  in UK my 20s no girlfriends / friends or other,  wore makeup ever .. never... the smell i would remember as so unused to it i sure noice it... as do the drains of the SW or Marches- built to manage a normal household of the 50s or so, when hardly any chemicals would go down them as we hardly used any.. relative to today the average inhuman having 20 or 50 items in their bathroom.... and no men ever ever used any products ever...)

Away from all distraction i forget - the ' chipping away' by fans of Eckhart assuming your personality is not " community" unique.

Boxes: last decade.

#1 .. xxx 

#2 2000 hrs.. general solo work on nature warden monitoring crimes  many thhou s km

#3..  over 1000 hours on where i certainly would never live. but the locals said they would like their homeless kids to live 

only vapid people pleasers over 5 years pretended ' interest'  even after 9 years ago the then team - we, took a tremendous risk speaking out at a parish council meeting " hey.. you are nicer than me... ask them about ' affordable housing'"  

" hiss.. BLACKS .. single mother druggies!!!.. fuck off back to Eywood hobo camp.. or we will get you  "  

2 years later the parish  large vote actually agreed with.. my position.. by considerable margin .  ( the merms having poisoned with drugs my team, only me left)

and a few others such as # 4 500 hrs on mentoring a few great younger greenish/ egalitarians . 

But...  box 1# .. i made a film on it thismorn  . because no one would believe 

2000 hrs on... REAL " community" work. for REAL green   i itiatives

having 9 years ago adopted a man of the region, the ONLY fairly good green science man, immediately i noted total lonely ocd  atomised angst in him... 

20 years alone... even if central Green politics man highly respected    nationally..

so what did i do for the ' cause'? whay no idiot could even ponder long enough all they do is open gobs  

over 5 + years i spent 1500 hrs attempting to have women Merms . .. Be his friend.. enjoy his world champion organic fruit for free ..  just pledge to take him for a cuppa maybe twice a year... resocialise him.. living too long alone whacks you way way sourly out of balance ... ( i dont need to protect his privacy as as i failed, thus  so did his mind .. has film )

i had 7  or 8 Merms there gradually over 5 years..  once a couple heMerm and she ....

.  David  quite charming ... best huge gardens of free fruit.. he never had anyone to share with...

And every single one.. every single one... people pleased

 " wow what a great oppourtunity thanks... i sure willdrop in... "  a man quite able to provide great healthier than gojii berry super meals too... 

And every single one .. just lied

never ever did what promised... 

And the funniest thing of all my one best ' friend' left from that ... actially nearer 10 of them...

she wont even remember for a year.. 2022.. all i  nudged her on ( for megga mutual benefit to her.. )... was that one ' kind' real.. environmentally essential... act... 

And that time and again she said she would....

but never actually ever


so so so historical chronicle INTERESTING....

i dont care

i am not sour for a second even recalling that ' box' of 2000 hrs wasted over 9 years.  .. every second had to be recorded for my protection as  with his 500k equity ... someone may take advantage

espesh when adult communicatiom means on day 1, each merm  " i can never benefit a penny..i created a pledge in writing just so...  if you do, i will know..   and fair exchange is ok .. he is lonely... if you just help him socialise a bit that will save his life for real and if you ended up in his will for half his selfbuild one day thats fair....  but do not EVER missquote me... i have never nor can i ever benefit one penny from him...  and ever suggest it for one s3cond locally......i have my protection..!!"

but history may thank me... and anyone helps me

the real story of why the environment is destroyed

no solidarity community

no memory of them saying " wow simon what a GREAT udea yes he is so essential to the cause... lets just "humanise" him a bit...  i will help... then the cause has him happier and healthier... a win wim situation!!. and my fruitshelf fills up with uniquely perfect superfruits for free.... [ " and dont worry i  told him years ago he is so tense ... so lacking human touch... its MORALLY ok to go and hire some pay-as-you-go in Cheltenham... to just keep him alive, and safe... as we need him as only good scientific eco brain in the whole region... so he aint gonna rape you...even if hes obviously smaller and weaker than you and  quaker  heritage  too   ..  " ] ..

my real schism...

having wasted those  boxes of life   

no one bithers ne, i only want nice smileytimes.. no obe even needs to keep to their word   

9 years of ultramerms lying to even a young mentoree of theirs ..    the only green party candidate under 50 for 75km... who is also actually green [ never any products in her bathroom i know as we shared one] grasshopper . 

causing her breakdown

them..not me... 

every singlewordcaptured

for posterity